A Galaxy Apart

Just Far Far Away

He does not know how much time had passed as he wakes up again lying curled up at the cold floor. Sitting up his eyes wander towards the window and the beauty of the distant stars shining down on him. All of space seems cold and empty. It seems as like there was nothing. Nothing at all. Sometimes he wishes his heart was just like that. Cold and empty so that he might get rid of the pain. Rid of the scars that are painted on his soul. He already tried to forget but that won't help. It never will. And it's against his own codex as he promised he'd never forget anyone. No, Jack wouldn't. But what else should he do? Was there a chance for him to get over Ianto's death. But even if, Jack was sure to he'd never find it.
He sits up and leans his forehead against the cold window while he dooms the distant fireballs for their ability to forget, to not feel and to just exist without pain. With an aching body he gets up and looks around the still empty room of which he hoped to leave soon. He wanted to go far far away. Maybe a diffent system or even a diffent galaxy. He'd take everything, just not Earth. With a shaky walk Jack picks up his coat and heads outside to the corridor to take a deep breath. And what now? It's early in the morning and he has no idea how far this ship has already traveled. His thoughts are chaotic and somehow...he doesn't even care about anything as he enters the lift.

When the doors open at the main deck and Jack leaves the lift he almost stumbles back by the huge mass of people who walk towards or away from the elevators. On this ship seem to be more passangers than Jack thought, way more. Blowfish, a sontaran, Martians, hybrids, robots, androids...
He can't believe how vivid this place is, how noisy and full of life it is here. Jack dares to leave the lift and enter the tangle of people who rush around him. A small Android runs into him and looks up.
"Don't just stand around here, idiot, move your ass or you'll never get anywhere and stand in the way" he says while shaking his fist and a few seconds later he is gone. Jack chuckles to himself. Maybe this little robot was right. He just had let go and move on. A little smile appears on his face as he starts to walk around, this whole space seems to be something like a Bazar. Several stalls are placed across the whole plazza and aliens, androids, robots and God knows what else about loudly along to promote their products. Yes, Jack has missed this. A place like that is just what he had been what he was used to before he joined Torchwood. This little chaos. The noise. The people. Everything. It was as like it was life itself what he could see right in front of his eyes, he just needs the guts to lead a new one.

Walking around he stands in front of some stalls watching with fascination the exotic fruits and plants, jewelry, traveling offers for cruise ship lines and vacations on foreign planets. He smells scents he had never noticed before, hears foreign languages shouting through the room and sees all sorts of stuff he has no idea what it's actually for, some toys and...certainly some of them can be used for a diffent kind of fun...
Jack shakes his head. God, he felt almost like the young man he used to be long ago. In the mid of life and his youth which he, on the outside, didn't lose yet.
And as he keeps walking around and smiling to himself he spots a lovely, elegant watch and turns around to opens his mouth as like he wanted to say something...but has realize that the person he wanted to address isn't there. He isn't there any more. His face drops and he looks at the floor.
'Ianto would have love that watch. It is his style...was his style' he corrects himself and closes his eyes for a moment. Jack can still see him. He can remember him so well as like he was standing right in front of him, as like he could touch him, feel his presence and breathe in this soft scent. Ianto's voice is still so present on his ear 'Jack' Ianto would have smiled as Jack entered the hub like every morning and finding his lover in the kitchen already preparing coffee. He would have handed a cup to Jack and said in his soft tone underlined with Welsh vowels 'Just for you, sir'. Jack would have winked at him and given him a soft kiss on the cheek before heading to his office. Maybe having taken ianto's hand and lead him with him when no one else was around. Kissed him in the silence of his office and pulled him in his lap sitting behind his desk. God, he can still feel the soft touch of ianto's lips on his own...

A tear runs down Jack's cheek without him noticing. No matter what he did, how often he might change his name, dress differently or go far away his heart would never forget the Welshman with the soft smile and sarcastic comments...and nothing would ever change that.

Jack feels the sudden wish to just drown himself to make his heart feel lighter. To forget his pain just for one moment and so he heads to a bar he spots at his left. It's visited by only a few people and so he sits down at the counter and ordering a Martian vodka. He stares at the wall in front of him where many bottles of alcohol were piled up. But that doesn't bother him. Not even the cute barkeeper seems to draw his attention on him although Jack gives him a charming smile on which the bar boy blushes and turns away. Sipping his drink he gets lost in thoughts until...
"Excuse me, Sir, but may I sit next to you?" an elder man asks Jack with a polite smile.
"Yeah..of course. Take a seat."
"Thanks" the man sits next to him and orders a drink. "You seem like someone who got a lot around, didn't you?" he starts interrogating Jack.
He nods. "Mhm. Traveled far and yet not far enough."
"And where do you want to go to, Sir?"
"I don't know yet...just far far away"
The man keeps silent for a moment
"Hm...maybe I can help you with that"
Jack looks him up and down and chuckles a bit to himself "Oh really? How can you know what will help me?"
"I've seen this look in your eyes...that look of pain."
"So? What do you want from me?"
"Nothing. I just want to help you"
"Oh...no one helps someone just because they want to help. The world doesn't work like that my friend."
The man keeps silent for a moment
"Look, I can offer you a job. Take it or leave it. I don't care. But I'm sure it might help you to distract yourself from your pathetic suffering"
"Oh wow. Thanks" Jack comments sarcastically.
"Take it or leave it. I'll be back here tomorrow the same time. And till then you can think about my offer." the man gets up and pays his drink.
"Who are you?"
"You'll find out tomorrow my boy" he says and was gone as sudden as he had arrived. Jack shakes his head and takes a sip of his drink. Weird man...and yet it might be a chance.