Mom

Chapter Eight

I don't know if you notice that all the Author's Notes are in bold so now that I just told you that I'm not going to keep putting Author's Note cause it gets boring and yeah. If you have any casting or song ideas or things like that message me and I'll check it out. Try to maybe like or comment cause I don't get alot of that and it might be because I don't think I ever really say that in these things but that's only because I don't like to be a nag and assume you would do that if you really liked my books and stuff. So yeah... Here's the story cause I've already spent too much time even typing this in my opinion tbh. Lol

I’ve been walking through the day, but I wasn’t actually there I was zoning out. The whole day I was out of it, my friends noticed too. Mostly Michael but he chose to ignore it, he tried to ask once but I shut it down before he could finish the question.

I got to all my classes listening in and out, catching certain things that I write down and focusing on the board, not the people around me. My mind wandered and a few times I got lost in it. My thoughts often began: ‘if my mother was a kidnapper...’ those thoughts disturbed me.

***

He laughs at the lunch table, so happy. I was just moving my food around the plate, not interested in conversation. Michael nudged me, “so are you ready for the ten page assignment due tomorrow?” I looked up suddenly. “What?” I practically scream. “He expects us to do a ten page essay in a day?! What kind of teacher is he? Is he on effing drugs?”

The guys start cracking up. “Kase, I’m fucking with you.” I start to laugh then stop, what he said sounded wrong. The other guys caught it and looked at him, he still hadn’t caught his slip up. “What” he says popping a grape into his mouth. “You guys know I fuck with her all the time, right Kase?” He asks.

Immediately my eyes well up with tears and he catches the slip. I get up and walk away, towards my locker. Instead I stop short and sit in a deserted hallway. It’s the hallway the seniors use and almost all of them are on a senior trip in the second half of the year. I put my forearms on my knees and let the tears come silently.

Had Michael told his friends things before when I wasn’t around? That I had given myself to him? What was I supposed to think about his sudden potty mouth and weather or not he had said this before, the words seemed to flow so freely, like they had been spoken so many times before.

He chased me down the halls, I hear him stop on the other side of the wall. His hand on the wall, about four feet above my head. “Go away” I whisper, my voice barely being heard by even myself.

“I didn’t mean it that way. You know I didn’t, it just slipped out.” I don’t care though. “But it passed your lips without a single thought and it sounded so careless, like you had told everyone about it already. You’ve seen the way the girls in the halls look at you, then the way they look at me, like I’m just some piece of meat that they’re waiting to be thrown away, and I know you see it too. Se why do you constantly surround yourself with a girl that you make no moves on? And that has been your friend for so long and not a girlfriend that you could possibly have forever?” I ask.

He seems surprised, at least that’s what I’m guessing he is, considering his silence. We stayed quite like that for quite sometime. It seemed like forever, but then he spoke even more words that made more tears spill from my eyes.

“Do you know what you are Kasey?” He swung around the corner of the wall to look at me. He literally looked down at me. “You’re a pusher, don’t you know that yet?” I was confused. “Michael what the hell is a pusher?” I looked up at him, a lost look in my eyes. I could stare into them all day.

“When someone tries to get close you push them away even further that they’ve gotten close.” I stood up and looked him in the eyes, no fear in them just determination. “You’ve been doing it all week since you got back from break. It was right after the principal brought you into the office and you need to effing snap out of it, right now! I miss my outgoing Kasey. The one that was loving and excited and generous and happy all the time. Sure she might’ve been crazy but I loved her all the same. In fact no matter what mood you’ve been in for the last year and a half I loved you and you were just too blind sighted to see it. I’ve been waiting for you to bring up the kiss since you got back from camping and you haven’t and I’ve started to get pissed about it.”

I looked up at him. “I’m sorry I didn’t bring it up, I was just confused and I didn’t want to ruin our friendship.” I’m still yelling. I pause and stand up straighter. “Also the reason I’ve been distant a lot isn’t because I have a lot on my mind, not because I’m not interested, because I am.” I say the last part of the last sentence quietly and begin playing with my fingers.

He walks towards me and holds my hands. “I’m sorry,” he says. I yank my hands back, “it doesn’t matter now, what’s done is done. You should probably get your friends.”

He shakes his head, “I want to be with you.” I smile slightly, he presses his palm against my cheek. I move my head to the left and pull away from his hand. I look down and say “not now someone will see.” He smiles “all the seniors are in the hall were the ones that leave for early admission to college and the other and the others are on the field trip.” He chuckles at my thought of us being caught.

I shake my head. “The teachers are coming back from there luch and the cameras and students with lockers in this hallway.” He looks sad that he’s not getting a kiss but I don’t care that much, I’ve got to think of a way to get out and find those people, to know that they aren’t my parents, for confirmation. He nods, “I’ve got to get to sixth period soon anyways.”

I roll my eyes. He’s always called our lunch period, which is only half an hour long, fifth period. Each person is assigned there own lunch hour so not everyone in our grade eats at the same time. He presses his hand against my cheek again and I lean into it this time, my other hand against the back of his palm. He lets go and walks away and I turn around, heading towards my locker, which was around the corner of this hall.

Suddenly two arms are wrapped around my stomach and I turn my face. Michael kisses me on the cheek. I was surprised. He let go and ran in the other direction. I stood there laughing at him. When he looked back I laughed, he had gotten a face full of hoodie fabric. “You crazy kids!” I yelled at him with my fist in the air, imitating an old man. I heard him chuckle and then he disappeared around the corner.