groupie; afi

two

     Just like the morning before, my alarm wakes me out of my sleep. The only difference is that I'm actually excited to get out of bed this morning. I spring out of the sheets and take a quick shower before I have to leave. I'm not quite sure how tour buses work so I wanted to take one in case I couldn't on the bus. I get my usual call from Vivian once I'm out.

     "I'm already up and showered," I say, putting the call on speaker mode so I can get dressed.

     "Good job, I'm proud of you. Maybe you won't be late today," She says, in a happy tone. It always pleased her when I managed to not fuck something up.

     "About that, I actually have a new job. It's only a year at least unless I wanted to keep going with it," I say, biting my lip.

     I had forgotten that I didn't tell her about what happened yesterday. I hope they aren't too mad at me for keeping it a secret.

     "Really? Why didn't you tell me? And what is it?" She starts questioning me.

     Here goes nothing.

     I explain to Vivian the events that led up to me becoming a groupie. I tell her about running into the manager and how I only agreed for the chance I could get my dream job from this. I don't mention that I think it'll be fun. I don't think that would go over too well if I seemed the slightest bit excited about it.

     "So basically, that's where I'll be for the next year. I plan on emailing my two-weeks notice in while I'm on the way to the bus," I conclude my story with.

     The silence coming from Vivian's end makes my stomach hurt. You could almost cut the tension with a knife even if she isn't here. I hear Vivian take in a sharp inhale before they say any words.

    "Are you dumb? You're quitting your job to be a fucking groupie? You haven't even had sex yet so how the hell are you gonna manage to do it all the time? You don't even know these guys," She raises her voice.

    I'm taken back by her harshness. I knew that she wouldn't be happy but I didn't think she'd be this upset. I mean, she isn't wrong about the sex thing but I don't necessarily have to have sex with them. Only if I want to.

     "He never said I had to sleep with them. Plus, I met them yesterday. They seem like genuine guys. Please don't try to lecture me on this. I've already made up my mind," I say, softening my voice.

     "Natalie, what do you think those guys are gonna want from you? Obviously they are gonna try it. And do I even need to mention that there is four of them and one of you? Meaning they could quite literally do whatever they wanted with you," She says.

     I hate being scolded like this. I usually can handle criticism and things like this well but when it comes from someone I love it hurts.

     "They actually can't. It's in the contract that if something like that happens then they will lose their job. Can you just be happy for me? Or at least fake it?" I say, my voice cracking.

     "No, I cant. I'm not gonna be happy that my best friend basically made herself into a prostitute," She says.

     I freeze up. I don't know if I'm offended or just hurt. Probably both. I hear the car that's supposed to be picking me up honk and I look back over to the phone.

     "I have to go. I'll, uh, talk to you later," I mumble, hanging up the phone.

     I grab my suitcases and walk out of the door. I feel awful after my conversation with Vivian. I could honestly cry but I don't want to ruin my makeup.