groupie; afi

thirty four

Again, I'm awaken to kisses being planted on my shoulders. It's honestly very cute. Ashton and I get up to go to breakfast. I wear my black sweats and a white tank top down to the dining hall since I don't feel like changing.

I sit with Mikey and Luke while Ashton finishes up making his plate. I take the opportunity to ask them if they know what's up with Calum while Ashton is gone. I know they would be honest if Ashton had said something to Calum.

"Hey, is Calum mad at me? He didn't talk to me at all yesterday," My eyes shift between the two boys.

Luke looks over at Michael then down to his lap. Obviously, he knows something but doesn't want to tell me. Michael takes a drink out of his grass and shrugs his shoulders.

"No idea. Calum has seemed fine to us," Michael says.

I look over at Luke, who's still avoiding looking at me. "Luke, you can tell me. I promise I won't be upset or anything," I tell him.

"Uh, there's nothing to tell. I'm sure Calum is fine," Luke finally looks back up. He's lying.

Ashton joins our table with his food. He smiles as he sits down next to me. He looks at the three of us with a confused face.

"What's up? Seems like you guys are upset?" Ashton's asks us.

Luke's eyes look over to Michael again and so do mine.

"Everything's fine. Luke just doesn't feel good," Michael reassures Ashton.

Ashton's shrugs it off, it seems like there's something more important in his mind anyway. Luke leaves the table early to go to the bus. I wonder what's going on inside his head.

The rest of us three finish our breakfast together. Not much talking goes on between us. It's like they both know something that I don't. I'm not too sure if they know something on Calum or Ashton's end.

We load into the best after we get everything ready. I catch a glimpse of Calum as I make my way through to my room. He doesn't even look at me.

Ashton and I go to my room and sit on my bed. He looks nervous. He takes in a deep breath and looks at me.

"Hey, I was thinking. How about at the next stop I take you to a nice dinner. We can get all dressed up and make it special," Ashton asks me.

"Sure, that sounds fun," I smile at him. Maybe it'll take my mind off the Calum stuff.

Ashton looks relived and sighs. "Cool, I can't wait," Ashton says.

A part of me wants to ask him about Calum but the other part is telling me I shouldn't. I know it might upset him but I need to know what's bothering Calum.

I figure the best thing right now is to text Calum. Maybe he will answer.

Me: hey cal, are you upset with me? you've been avoiding me.

A few minutes pass so I start to lose hope. I start to build up a timeline of things that's happened so I can point out where he'd be mad.

Josslyn came in, Calum and I got closer, Josslyn left and Ashton broke up with me, Calum and I keep getting closer, I keep hooking up with Ashton, then Calum avoids me.

Its Ashton. The reason is Ashton.

But did he say something to Calum or is Calum just backing off? Knowing Ashton, he probably threatened him but Ashton knows I would flip on him if he did. I don't know.

I look over at Ashton, he looks so unbothered. I fidget with my thumbs, trying to decide if I should ask.

I'm gonna do it.

"Ashton, did you say anything to Cal to make him stop talking to me?" I talk fast to get it over with.

Ashton looks taken back, "No? Not anything on purpose anyway. I know you care about him so I wouldn't wanna upset you."

That's a relief. So Calum is just backing off.

But how would he know about Ashton and I sleeping together?

Calum's POV
The day went by slow. Every hour felt dragged out. It's finally 10 p.m but I can't sleep.

I lay there in my bed. I can't sleep, my mind is too restless. I can't get Ashton's words from yesterday out of my head.

"Natalie and I are still sleeping together so I think she's still into me. So, I plan on asking her back out soon."

The words reply over in my mind. I could recite the whole sentence from memory if someone asked me too.

I should've known that Natalie wasn't over Ashton. Why couldn't I see it? It's always been them. Why did I think I actually had a chance?

I stare at the bunk above me. I can hear Luke's snores all the way on the bottom bunk. It's almost comforting though when usually I would be annoyed by the distraction from my sleep. But right now, it's a distraction from my own thoughts.

Knowing Natalie, she's going to try and talk with me soon. She probably doesn't have a clue as to why I'm upset. I try to gather somethings that I want to say since so can't sleep. Might as well make some use of this time.

A part of me, as naive as it may be, hopes Natalie will tell me that she wants me when she does come to talk. But, I prepare for the worst.

After all, the worst is usually my luck when it comes to relationships.

_____
authors note
i don't like calum being sad :(

also i think i'm gonna release the michael book next week 😋 haven't made up my mind yet tho