Chaos rings through my teeth like
A cavity in need of being filled.
Unease settles in my chest.
When I look at you,
I see the ghost of her.
Everything in me locks shut
Clamps tight
Begging to not let her in again.
I cannot stop the dreams but
I can stop the conscious feelings.
Vice versa. Whatever.
"She shouldn't force me to choose,
Because I wouldn't choose her"
Do you mean it?
Mean it the way that I once had to?
Mean it in the way that I bled for
Every single minute of opening my
Mouth?
This is not grey territory,
You cannot bring her back into me.
I locked my walls, she lost the key.
So, mean it.
Mean it , because my nightmares
Are back and in them she
Dangles my life in her
Hand like it is nothing more
Than a string bracelet.
She laughs and she is cruel
And just as wicked as I remember.
I still do not know how to
Voice all the things that haunt me
How to look at them and not flinch
As if they were real and happening...
YOU ARE READING
I Was Once a Sunflower
PoetryThis poem collection will be about who I used to be, searching for myself, and living when I didnt want to. They are sad, this description serves as my trigger warning.
