Hope Shepherd

Going Home

POV Hope: Today is the day, the day I get to go home. I'm excited to get out of the hospital but I don't know what I'll do with myself. Everything is different now. I'm not the way I was, something was literally different and how do I ever move past it? Amelia was in her own room and Owen was still working. JJ and Jo walked in smiling. "Are you ready to go home?" JJ asked. "I think so," I replied. She handed me a card. "My team is going back to DC today, but if you need anything or need someone to talk to feel free to call me," she explained. "Thank you," I whispered and gave her a hug. She left the room. "So, I'm going to give you one last check up and bandage change and you'll be free to go," she announced. I lifted my shirt and looked at the bandage on my belly. Jo peeled it back and I saw the wound. It seemed to be healing well, though there will be a scar. I winced when she cleaned it with an alcohol pad. "You okay?" She asked. I nodded, "yeah it just stings a bit." She checked my vitals and finally took out my IV. I had to slip off my sweatpants so she could see my legs. "So, how do you feel about going home?" she asked while checking my bruises. "I'm not sure. I guess I'm happy to be out of the hospital," I answered. I clenched my legs as she pressed on a bruise that wasn't as healed. My mind shot back to the rape. "Oh sorry," she apologized. I regained view of my surroundings. I shook my head, "It's okay, I'm fine." "I can tell your not," Jo exposed. I gripped the blanket around me tighter and turned to the side. "I know you might not feel like talking right now, but listen to me alright. Yes, your life will be different and it may never be the same. You WILL move past this, that feeling won't last forever." I turned my head to meet her gaze. I let her hold my hand, "okay" I whispered simply.

POV Amelia: We could finally go home today... I can only hope that I wouldn't relapse. April strolled into my room. "Hi!" she said in her preppy voice. "So I'm going to check your vitals and get a tox screen then as soon as that comes back your free to go," she announced. I nodded. When April was done Meredith came in. "Hey, how are you doing?" she asked. "Ugh I think I'm alright. I'm worried about Hope... she's been through so much and I don't know how to help her," I explained. "She's a strong girl, but she might need more than just what you can give her," Mer voiced her thoughts. "I know, we've already set up time for a therapist. Owen and I are expecting her PTSD and flashbacks to get worse," I told her. "Well, what about you? Hope wasn't the only person who went through a trauma," she asked gently. I breathed in deeply, "I'm supposed to get therapy the hospital recommended. And uh I've been having flashbacks as well.." Tears filled my eyes as I started to breathe heavily. "Hey, it's okay. I'm here for you if you need anything," she offered. "Thanks," I whispered and accepted the hug from her. April walked back in. "Good news, your tox screen came back negative and I checked on Hope and she's free to go as well." she presented the information. April gave me a hug, "If you need anything, anything at all don't be afraid to ask." I thanked her as she got paged for a trauma. Meredith looked at me, "So what's you plan for today?" "I have something I want to do before I leave," I said. "Alright, well I'm going back to work. See you later," she smiled waving goodbye.

 I got up and put my stuff together. I walked to Richard's office. I knocked on the door, "Hey..." "Well hello Amelia. I meant to check on you earlier but I got pulled into surgery," he greeted. "It's alright. Can a talk to you?" I asked shyly. "Yes of course, please sit," he held his hand out towards the chair. "Th.. the person that uh took me gave me oxy. I can't get it out of my head. Even though I was kidnapped and tortured when he gave me that oxy I still felt that high... I don't know what to do, I have to sit on my hands and it takes all my willpower not to touch the drugs in the hospital," I explained trying not to stutter too much. He took off his glasses an relaxed his face, "I'm heading to an AA meeting tonight, I'll pick you up at 9 and we can go together. Remember, this was NOT your fault. You did not choose to take that oxy, that wasn't you. You went through so much work to stay sober don't ever forget that. And think about all the people who care for you, you have so much to live for. You can do it, I believe in you," Richard spoke strongly. I had tears streaming down my face. "Richard, you don't understand how much that meant to me," I expressed. "Your strong Amelia, very strong. I'm glad to be here for you whenever you need it," he replied. I gave him a giant hug. "Now, go get your daughter and go home," he said smiling. I took a breath, waved goodbye, and walked out.

I slowly wandered around the empty hospital hallways gathering my thoughts. I pulled out my phone and called Owen.

Phone call:

Owen: Hey babe, how you doing?

Amelia: Fine, I'm free to go. Do you want to meet me at Hope's room before we head home?

Owen: Yea let me get someone to cover me real quick

Amelia: Okay see you there

Owen: I love you

Amelia: Love you too

POV Amelia: Owen and I both reached her room at the same time. He took my hand and we walked in together. "Hi Hope, You ready to go?" I asked while striding over to her bed. I sat next to her. Owen stayed standing in front of the bed. She was silent. I scooped her up onto my lap. She turned her face into my chest. I gave Owen a look and he nodded leaving the room. "Hey, it's just us now," I announced gently. "It's not that I don't want to see Owen, but I see him everywhere," she mumbled. "I understand I see him too," I admitted. "How does anyone want me? I'm messed up," she sobbed. I hugged her, I wish she never had to feel like this. "You are still the same beautiful girl you were before, you can grow from this. Don't let him win. We can do this together," I tried encouraging her trying to get myself to believe it too. She hauled herself from the bed, "Let's go home." She offered a smile. I took her hand in mine and the three of us walked out of the hospital.

A/n: Did you like it? Feedback is appreciated!

Random Question of the Day: How do you imagine Hope to look like? I'm not sure if I gave any parameters to what she looked like. Though I think I'll leave it open to imagination.