the time I have left [bakudeku]

ⓒⓗⓐⓟⓣⓔⓡ ⑤: once again I'm useless

𝙸𝚣𝚞𝚔𝚞'𝚜 𝚙𝚘𝚟

I woke up looking around. It's a different picture from the hospital. I'm in my own room again and it feels nice. I looked at my walls and saw all the posters that hung there. All of them of the best hero out there. All might.  I sighed and noticed the room wasn't bright. I need to notice these things. I chuckled to myself. I checked the time and realized it was four in the morning. Would I't be to early to go for a walk? I want to go out. Maybe I could go back to the beach. The beach where I did intense training to prepare my body for one for all. I have to tell all might that he has to find another successor. Should I tell him why? or just return the power? I think it would only be fair if he knew, After all he went through all the trouble of training me. I grabbed my phone off of my nightstand and texted all might. I think he should be awake. I texted him asking him if we could meet up at the beach.  I set my phone down on my bed and grabbed by hoodie and threw on some sweats. And then my phone buzzed.  I walked over to it and checked my phone. It was from all might. ' Yes we can. Is something wrong?' he responded.  I didn't respond. I just shoved my phone into my pocket and quietly left the house. I walked to the beach. the sky was still dark but it was lighting up as I walked closer to the beach. when I made it to the beach I saw all might in his weak form. I walked to his side and rested my arms on the bars in front of me leaning down. 

"hey young midoriya whats up?"

I turned to him and smiled. then I turned back to the beach. It's so nice. the waves in the back. 

" I'm sorry all might" 

was all I said. he looked at me. I didn't turn to him. 

"you have to find another successor. I'm sorry"

it was quite for a while. I could feel his confusion. I wonder what he thinks of me. That i'm no good. that he shouldn't have trusted me. that he wasted his time on me. 

"yeah and why is that young midoriya, I'll take it back but why? wasn't this your dream to become a hero? why would you throw it away." 

I sighed. I could feel tears forming in my eyes. I guess I could tell him. 

" Well sir, I don't think that a dead person would use one for all very well." 

he was quite while he processed what I said.  I could feel him staring at me. 

"what do you mean dead person? young midoriya are you planning on taking your life? are you going to die?" 

I sighed and looked over at him.  Do I really look like someone planning on taking their life? I would never. even after everything i've been through. But I don't blame him. 

" I mean what I said sir. No I'm not planning anything stupid like that. I am going to die though. there's nothing I can do to stop it either." 

I could feel all might stare at me. 

"how?....." 

I heard him whisper. I looked over at him and saw his eyes water. 

" I was hit by a quirk. the quirk is slowly destroying my body. eating at blood bone... everything. I have about thirteen days including today." 

I saw him shift a bit and then look over at the ocean. 

"did they catch the person who did this to you?" 

I shook my head and sighed. I grabbed a strand of my hair and put it in his hands. 

"here you go all might. choose a great successor for me. one that always smiles. and just for my sake please help kacchan. he knows about it and he's hurting. I wan't you to make sure he never loses sight of his dream. of course when I'm gone. for now I want to enjoy being his rival." 

I smiled up at him and I could see his concern. I sighed. 

"a hero always smiles even when facing death. you taught me that, all might."  

I smiled and then walked away. I better get home before classes start. I don't want to be late. I quickly ran home. My mom was still asleep. That's a relief. I ran up to my bedroom and threw on my uniform. I flopped down on my bed and sighed. Everyone else is at the dorms right now. But i'm at home since I was just discharged from the hospital. I grabbed my back pack and went down stairs. My mom was now up and sitting on the couch. 

"oh Izuku. isn't it a little early for you to be heading off to school?" 

I sighed. shes right. But if I stay here she might ask about what happened at the hospital, and I can't lie. its hard for me to lie. 

"yeah your right it is a bit early." 

I walked over to the couch and plopped down. I sighed and my mom looked over at me. I guess I could just try to avoid the conversation.

" something wrong izuku?" 

she asked. concern lacing her voice. oh god. not now I'm an idiot .what should I do? what should I say? 

"nothing just um... nervous.... no thats not it scared.... umm wait no....ahhh , It's nothing mom." 

she looked over at me and I could see her face fill with even more concern. 

" what Is it Izuku midoriya. Tell me or I will forbid you from going to school until you do."

What? that not fair at all. she can't do that. she is my mother though. she should know though. after all I am her son. so should I tell her? or should I just not go to school. No  I have to go. I don't have much time with my friends. and I want to make the time I spend worth it.

"mom, I'm scared.... I'm scared because I..... this is harder then I thought it would be..." 

I whispered the last part under my breath. 

"what is it what are you scared of izuku?" 

I looked at her and then looked back down. I felt a tear roll down my check. 

" I'm scared because I'm dying mom..." 

I whispered. 

I did it.... 

I told my mom....

so far kacchan, my mom, iida, and all might know.