Looking into the mirror always had been hard. Curly hair, thick facial and body hair greeted her early on.
It was exhausting. Exhausting to endure the pain of waxing, threading or shaving.
He, the sun of her galaxy, made it bearable. The sight of the natural hairy, chubbier girl in the mirror.
In another society, she might have been considered beautiful but all she felt now was disgust.
One look at her hands and all she could hear were screams. Screams so loud, so agonizing that they take over. Take over her body wherever she might be.
She fell on her knees, trying to steady her upper body with her outstretched hands as she watched the carpeted floor. Her curly hair falling to the front. The guilt was eating her alive. She had made a promise. A promise to protect.
To him on their wedding night and to him who was growing in her belly a year later.
The golden light reflecting from her ring finger made her squint her eyes, a reminder of her failure.
Lifting the heaviness of her head slowly to stare back at the glossy eyes on the wall showed her one thing.
She did not deserve to be loved ever again.
Her head started spinning as she started laughing out loud. She laughed, oh how she laughed. The echo of the high pitched noise traveling throughout the almost empty home.
Once again she found herself in the secure arms of the booth. The heavy liquor having kicked in long ago as she lie on the cushioned bench. The old Japanese pop song playing in the background as she gazed at the dim ceiling.
Stay with me...
Mayonaka no doa o tataki
She hummed along to the familiar melody as she took another sip of the intoxicating bottle that made her head even more fuzzy.
Kaeranaide to naita
Ano kisetsu ga ima me no mae
The lyrics sung in a lower key, demonstrating her inner pain, followed by the fallen stars tracing her cheeks built the perfect picture of a widow in sorrow.
How he found himself outside the familiar place once again, he didn't know. It was an instinct. Although he told his friends he'd be busy and told his fellow co workers he'd be out, he did not expect the path of night to lead him here. Not questioning it though, he leaned onto the concrete wall outside as he fished the rolled item from his pocket. Growing up he was taught that pleasure is a sin. Now he believes there's not a greater sin to commit than the one out of pleasure. As he lightened the cigarette, he couldn't help but calm down at the soothing feeling filling his lungs.
He shouldn't be doing it out here. Not if anyone who could recognize him could walk by. The timing made him unbothered.
He doubted Paparazzi or Saesang's stalked the young man at 4 am.
He doubted that anybody would even be inside the still open karaoke place behind him.
But what would life be without it's constant urge to prove us wrong.
Surprised was the least you could describe the bad boy from next door as when a certain curly haired woman stumbled out of the door. Inhaling one last drag, he threw the tip of the cigarette to the ground before stumping onto it. Although looking severely intoxicated, the curly haired woman put her chin up the moment she recognized someone else was around. Seeing the woman trying to walk steady past him was amusing as she whispered softly.
„House with no mirrors."
He looked up. The stars were gazing at him as a sudden urge made itself known. So, with no cause he followed the woman, trying to ensure she'd get home safely.
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AZIZAM | kth
Fanfiction"Orphan is what we call someone whose parents have died, but how about the other way around? there's no word for it in the Korean language because there's no word powerful enough to equate the pain of a parent losing a child." The story of a grievin...
