The Return

Chapter 56

Dreams for the Future

"Anata" Sakura whispered, nudging her husband. There was no movement. She bit her lip and sighed. She couldn't wait any longer. "Sasuke, are you awake?" She shook his shoulder gently.

"Hn?" he stirred slightly, coming to.

"I need Anmitsu dessert and tofu."

He pinched his brow. "It's three in the morning, Sakura. Go back to sleep."

"I need it now though. I feel like I'm starving."

"Just eat something else" he replied frustratingly.

"I can't." She paused while he stayed silent. Sighing, she turned over. "Fine, I'll go get it myself. I'd hate to be an annoyance after all." She smirked slightly.

Sasuke grumbled as guilt overwhelmed him. She could be so troublesome sometimes. He rubbed his eyes, trying to wake himself up. "Fine" he yawned, hauling himself into a seated position.

Sakura smiled as he got dressed grudgingly. "Thanks, Anata" she whispered.

He rolled his eyes before heading down the laneway in the direction of a nearby town.

Staring up at the night sky full of stars, Sakura thought about how lucky she was to be here. Even camping out with Sasuke in the middle of winter felt like a dream come true. Considering all they'd been through; she never thought this day would come. She loved him so much she felt like she couldn't stand it some days. His crooked smile, his dark eyes, his mysterious presence; she loved it all. But most of all she loved his capacity for love and kindness. Many thought he was cool and distant, but she and Naruto knew the truth. Sasuke felt things on a deeper level than anyone else. He was incredibly emotional and even anxious at times. He put up a wall that only she and Naruto managed to break through over the years.

Drifting off to sleep, she wondered if he was truly happy now. Something seemed to be weighing on his mind ever since he visited the place where he killed Itachi. He was putting up a wall again, even in front of her. Was he was missing his brother? Or something that extended beyond that? She wondered...

***

"Sakura?" Sasuke shook his wife slightly as she snored softly. It took him a full hour to find her strange dessert and tofu combination. She'd better not fall asleep on him now. "Sakura" he nudged her again.

She grumbled and kept snoring softly. She held her abdomen as she slept. Her face had a look of slight strain as she tried to get comfortable.

Sighing, Sasuke gave up his attempts  and placed the bag of sweets on the ground. He sat on a log gazing into the dying embers of their fire as the starry sky turned an inky blue color with the coming dawn. Sarada, he thought. Ever since their clash in the Hidden Mist, he'd been having dreams of his daughter over and over again. She constantly flooded his thoughts as she toddled along, telling him to come back home. Her joy was infectious much like Sakura's personality, which gave him hope for the future. There was something about the way she begged him to come home that bothered him though. It was almost as if she was giving him a warning for the future. He shook his head. Why am I even thinking about these things when my child isn't even born yet?

He glanced at his wife. He hated to leave her but knew that their time would soon be up. In another couple of months, he'd have to disappear from their lives. This time it was likely he'd be gone for most of Sarada's childhood. It was a devastating thought. He wondered if there was some way, he could stay with them for even a short time. Still, perhaps it was for the best that he left. If anything happened to either of them, he knew he wouldn't be able to handle the darkness. Their journey to the Hidden Mist taught him that much. Maybe distancing himself would help him to keep his emotions in check. He knew he'd never stop thinking about them in that time, but he would vow to protect them even from a distance. Still, would being away from them both make Sarada hate him? Would he be a terrible father to her? Glancing at Sakura he realized he could bear it, just as his brother did before him. So long as his wife loved her twice as much to make up for his absence, he could live with that idea. Although it would be difficult, he didn't mind being an obstacle for her to overcome. So long as she was safe and happy in the Leaf, it would all be okay.

As dawn broke through the clearing, he looked up at the fading stars glowing in orange and blue light. Mom, dad, brother, please help me to find a way to be near my daughter without...without losing myself entirely.

"Mmm, Sasuke?" Sakura woke slowly, rubbing her eyes as the sun shone upon them. "What's wrong?"

"Hn?" Sasuke brought himself back to reality, looking down at his tired wife. Concern was etched across her face as she reached up towards him. Feeling a breeze on his cheek, he touched it with his fingertip. Tears?

"Sasuke?" she repeated his name. Sitting up slowly, she sat level with her husband. She placed her hand on his cheek and wiped away his tears with her thumb. "Talk to me. What's going on?"

Her green eyes sparkled with the sunlight, but also a sense of determination that made him fall more in love with her each time he saw that expression. He closed his eyes and grasped her hand before bringing it to his lips and kissing it softly. "It's nothing" he smiled. "Don't worry about it."

She glanced at him unconvincingly with her arms crossed.

He sighed, picking up the bag of dessert and tofu. "Here," he said, handing it to her.

"Hm?" She looked confused, opening it. "Anmitsu and tofu? That's a weird combo."

Sasuke's anger flared slightly. Did she really not remember? "Last night" he replied through gritted teeth.

"What about last night?" She asked, still clueless.

He sighed, letting the situation go in the knowledge that it was hopeless. "Seriously? This is the third day in a row" he grumbled.

"Huh?"

"Forget it."

"But-"

"Forget it" he shut her down. Seeing her disgruntled expression though, he smirked and placed his hand on her head. "You really are annoying sometimes" he chuckled.

She blushed slightly but smiled back.

Slowly but surely, he felt his worries slip away as the sunlight brought new hope for the coming spring. He knew now more than ever that he wanted to spend as much time with them as he could before he left again. Just give me a little more time, he prayed. Just let me see my daughter's smile.