The Lost Poet Diaries

Crawl

Never hold a grudge

But you fuel my hate

Never been enough

But can fill your plate

Always behind the scenes

Invisible to the eye

What does it all mean?

To hide behind a lie

Unresolved and conflicted

Thought I moved on

Now unable to risk it

Remained damaged all along

One day you'll be alone

Words lost in the wind

Numb to the bone

Becoming hollow within

Vibrations and sounds

Itching at the brain

They hover, they surround

Leaving imprints of pain

The bitterness spreads

With every word you avoid

The silence is dead

It's time to fill the void

An unfinished book

No moral to the story

Song without a hook

I've let go of the worry

You will never apologize

For the way you react

For hiding in a disguise

And never giving back

But I guess I understand

The past holds you steady

Lift the mask when you can

Come back when you're ready

Prioritize everything on your list

Then have your relapse

Once again, return to it

Keep it in your grasp

Lost for words, I'm mute

Nothing left to stir

Pulled out from the root

Just put me back in the dirt

Damage is an infection

It needs proper care

Needs further inspection

I just won't be there

Out here in the cold

While you remain warm

No longer feeling bold

Inner thoughts start to swarm

That familiar numb feeling

Suddenly rushes back to me

These layers keep peeling

But you will never see

The depths of this shield

That darkens every time

I try to heal

Try to stay in line

But chaos only escalates

Making it hard to notice

While you cheerfully celebrate

As I lose my focus

My senses are heightened

Don't know where to look

Its all just so frightening

All the chances I took

You looked the other way

Not paying any mind

Now everything you say

Is everything but kind

Nothing left to hold

Just done with it all

This time I will fold

Can't walk until I crawl