Sleeping With Money (MewGulf AU)

🌞Chapter 19🌻

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"I've been looking for you."

Gulf lay down on the bank, looking up at the sky. Mew showed up a while later and sat down next to him. Gulf still felt awful.

"He didn't notice," he said suddenly.

"Huh?"

"The old man," Gulf clarified. "He didn't notice I was one of those kids. He said he was a probation officer."

A probation officer watched over wayward kids until they were rehabilitated. But the police had never caught Gulf back then, so he had never met Rachan as a probation officer. Their meering was entirely coincidental. Gulf had never even know Rachan did that kind of work.

"Of all the kids Rachan worked with, I was definitely the worst. I'm a worthless scum. If Rachan ever found out, he'd probably wish he'd never helped me. It wouldn't matter that I looked like his son. In fact, that would only make it worse."

A vacant smile spread over Gulf's face.

He had always wanted people to fear hin. He thought his Yakuza life fulfilled his dream. So why did his heart torn to pieces by some old man? He knew talking to Mew wouldn't help, but he couldn't stop baring his soul.

"I understand why the old man's so stubborn," he continued. "But it's pointless, isn't it?" No one will cone back to find him now. Who's he waiting for, anyway? No one. No one." His voice faded into the darkness.

Finally Mew spoke. "He wants to be useful to someone, anyone. He realizes there's no point now, but he still thinks he can help. And that alone keeps him going, keeps him happy."

Mew didn't need to tell Gulf all this. Guld already knew. Even though he had taken a completely different path in life, he still understood the old man.

Intimidation would not work with Rachan. In fact, nothing would. The days when Gulf only had to issue fierce threats were over.

He glance over at Mew, remembering how it felt when their skins touched. He had only slept with this man once, but he was already addicted. Make no mistake, he still hated Mew. But he was feeling so depressed and so lonely right now, he wanted Mew by him.

Mew continued in his soft voice. "But Mr. Rachan must have remembered you! Those eyes make you look like a stray wildcat. People never forget guys like you. Plus you lied to him way back then. He would definitely remember that."

"Don't wanna hear it," Gulf muttered.

Now Mew copied Gulf and sprawled on the bank. He crossed his arms under his head and looked up into the night.

"Nope, he didn't remember me," Gulf went on. "But he doesn't have to wait for me or anyone else. He should move to the country and plough fields or something."

"Why not tell Mr. Rachan that you have no regrets?" Mew suggested. "Say you were one of the kid he helped out. Tell him that you've chosen a gangster's life and you don't need his help. Then he can stop waiting. Maybe he'll give up and leave."

"Ugh," Gulf snorted, lighting a cigarette. In the darkness, the flame glowed orange. He zoned out, watching the smoke rise into the air.

Sounded like a good plan. But even though Gulf would have loved to make that speech, he just couldn't. He stared up at the starless, cloudy sky. Mew had nothing else to say.

As dawn drew near, Gulf, shivering, decided it was time to go home. He glanced over at Mew, who was sleeping peacefully.

Should I just leave him here?

He took a blanket from his car, covered Mew with it, and left. He felt he had done a good deed, plus didn't want to hear Mew griping that he caught a cold.

TBC