Submissive Desires

6 - Confirmation

Over the week Ciarren worked diligently on the rough set up for the website. It was just rough sketches made up of a series of boxes, symbols, and colors. By the following Monday, he had all the sketches done. So he sat down to set up the email to Jesper. He attached the documents and let him know that they could either meet to go over what everything means or they could do a phone call, whatever Jesper prefers. While waiting for a response, Ciarren began to prepare to throw himself into this project. He didn't have anything else to work on, so he would be able to dedicate all his time to this website. To get everything prepared, Ciarren started with a shower. He took his time as he enjoyed the hot spray. He gave everything a good wash, taking special care with his curls. He spent a couple minutes just standing under the spray attempting to let all of his anxieties wash down the drain. He didn't let himself think about anything except for the website he would be starting soon. Soon enough his fingers were starting to prune and his stomach was rumbling with hunger pains, so he dragged himself from the shower and threw on a pair of grey sweatpants. He left his shirt off and quickly started french braiding his dripping curls. He didn't want it in his face and the braid would help to not completely ruin the curls. As he worked, he kept his eyes locked on his hair, not letting them wander to the scars that littered his chest. He refused to even think about what his back must look like. He was just happy that he had completely healed from Max's recent attack.

All while Ciarren was showering and making food Jesper was freaking out about how to respond to the email. He desperately wanted to meet with Ciarren again, but he knew he wouldn't be able to stay silent. Zareh watched him with amusement as Jesper paced the length of the office. "Before you wear a whole into the carpet, why don't you just video call him." Jesper instantly brightened up and raced to the computer, but before Zareh could remind him to reply to the email first Jesper had already hit call.

Ciarren just about dropped his iced coffee when he heard his computer start to ring. He flopped into his chair and anxiously looked at the screen, the words "Jesper requesting Video Call'' flashed across the screen and in his panic he hit the accept button. Not even thinking about the fact he was not at all dressed for a video conference. Ciarren set his cup down on his desk with shaky hands as the screen flashed dark before two faces took over the screen. He recognized Jespers white hair, intriguing eyes, and happy smile, but he did not recognize the other man. He was much bigger than Jesper. He had much more muscle and he looked much more... dominant. He fit the term in every kind of way. Ciarren instantly dropped his eyes to his keyboard. He was practically shaking with anxiety. He had been avoiding anyone bigger than Jesper... anyone that could possibly remind him of a Dom... of Max... He felt his breathing start to speed up as he attempted to focus on the fact that it is not Max on the screen.

Jesper felt his happiness dwindle as he took in the panicking man on the screen. He didn't think through what Ciarren's reaction would be, but he couldn't think on that too long as his attention was quickly dragged to the fact that Ciarren wasn't wearing a shirt. They could see his entire chest and he was covered in scars. Some of them were a pale white and healed while others were pink and looked rough to the touch. Jesper was so lost in thought of what could have possibly caused all the scars that he didn't even realize that Ciarren was falling farther into a panic attack. All the while, Zareh's mind was racing, but he couldn't focus on Ciarren's looks right now. He needed to pull him out of the panic attack before he passed out.

Suddenly both were startled by a demanding voice, "Ciarren. Breathe in until 3"

Ciarrens hands tangled into his braided hair and his body tried to listen as the voice counted. It took a couple tries before finally he was able to take a deep breath, hold, and release. His eyes were closed, but he listened to the deep voice as it talked him through the process. He unconsciously whimpered before speaking almost too quietly, "I-I'm so-sorry..." He still hadn't looked at the screen. His eyes stayed locked on his keyboard, his hands gripping the armrests of his chair, and his body still shaking.