Beauty and the Beast (Remus Lupin)

95.

Another day, another funeral.

This one hurt. This one felt horrible to wake up to. This was her actual goodbye. The moment she wanted to push aside had finally came.

The entire time, Rose looked down at her hands. Looking up at his family who gave their speeches was gut wrenching. Everyone was mourning his death differently than others.

Rose didn't even want to think about going up there. She was to go on after George, who was next up.

She closed her eyes as she tried to steady her breathing, she wish she was able to disappear. Rose wished wasn't there, she wished no one was here. All in all, she wished Fred was alive and by her side. That nothing bad had happened.

Remus grabbed her hand as her time came closer.

"Fred was my brother, my best friend, and he was a man like no other," George said, "He laughed, he joked, and he was always Fred. There was nothing in this world that could've stopped him from achieving what he wanted. We left school, started our business and now...and now I've got to finish what we started." He looked around, "I want his achievements to be seen by the wizarding world. I want people to think of him and laugh at his memories. He wouldn't want us to cry, he'd make fun of us all for that...h-he always talked about his firsts. Like, how he'd be the first to do something before I do...I wish it would've been that way. The harsh truth is that...it's not. Fred's death was not an accident."

Rose wiped away a fallen tear as she replayed the scene in her head.

They were laughing, he was remembering Percy's jokes, their was an explosion, he pushed her out the way and the last thing either of them had seen was their smiles.

"Fred wasn't as sensitive as I am. He was the goofy one instead. One person had managed to change that though. She had given him a purpose to do something he had never thought about. Her needs were greater than his that day. And I know for a fact, he wouldn't have hated this. He wouldn't have hated how he had to die to save her life, because he'd do it a million times over again...Besides, I got his murderer rather good I'd say." George slipped in that joke. "Anyways, I'm going to miss him more than anything." He turned around and touched his coffin, "till we meet again, Freddie..."

Everyone clapped as George stepped down. It was Rose's turn now.

Rose stood up and walked up front. However, once the coffin came into view, her heart sunk to the pit of her stomach. She didn't want to be this close to him. She didn't want to be so close and know he was dead.

So instead, she stopped halfway and turned to face the crowd.

"Fred was..." Rose looked down as she tried to calm down, "Fred was a angel living on earth...When I met him for the first time, I never truly imagined a different life. And frankly, I don't think I'll ever meet someone that can compare to him...He was always there for me, even when I wanted no one. Fred made sure I was alright...and that's what hurts more than anything. Knowing he's..." She started to cry more, "Knowing that he's not here to check up on me. Knowing that he's not here to give me a cheap laugh by his work stories. I could've talked to anyone else about my problems but it'd never feel the same as it did with him."

Roses head was spinning as her eyes burned from the gush of tears. "I have everything I dreamed about, except for my life with him in it. I never knew the true meaning of heartbreak, I never knew I could be so lonely, I never knew my heart would hurt this way or that I'd still be here without him...But I can only be grateful that I had gotten the chance to know him. I would've rather known him for just a moment than never at all."

She closed her eyes trying to speak from the parts of her heart she had left, "I'd rather go through this agony of outliving him than to have never seen his face or speak his name...Loving him changed my life. But losing him did too. To lose someone you love is to alter your life forever. The pain will stop eventually, I hope...but the hole left in my heart will never be filled. I wished we had more time...but we didn't. I wish...I wish we would've gotten a proper goodbye but he was gone before I knew it."