Just A Thought

Chapter 8

Olen

I her hugged so tight, I didn't know what else to do. I tried to soothe her but I could tell that it was not working.

I felt helpless as I practically watched her break down in front of me.

I rubbed circles on her back for while before she started to calm down. I should probably take her back.

Then as I thought she'd calm down and breathe normally she strarted hyperventilating and  screaming. At this point tears were coming out. I tried to reach for her cheek but she flinched involuntarily.

I sighed, walking away to sit down.

"D-d-don't go," she stuttered.

"I wasn't leaving," I mumbled. I looked at her, her eyes were shut. She clenched her fists and I see the pain seething out of her .

I know what she's going through, I've been there well not exactly but yeah. When the demons finally catch up to you. When the shit that you have avoided finally finds it's way to you and there is literally nothing you can do about it other than face the past you've been running from. This usually happens after the mirror room, well for  me that is.

I could see her calming down again and I took this opportunity to soothe her. She hugged me tightly as if she were trying her best to come out of it.

"It's okayyy, it will be. You're here with me. I'm here for you." I said softly.

I cupped her cheek and wiped her tears. Her eyes were still shut and I could tell she was trying her best to steady her breathing.

I carried her realizing that unless I do she probably will never move. I made my way out of the forest knowing that the party is probably the last place she'll want to be at.

...

I was practically panting as I got to her room with Bia. She was not exactly asleep but she was not fully awake either. I put her down on her bed and watched as her eyes fluttered.

She looked at me and I saw the pain in her
eyes, I saw the hurt, I saw all the shit that got her fucked.

She sighed.

"I'm sorry," she began

"Don't."was all I could bring myself to say.

She gave me a small smile as she narrated the events of her attack . I stayed sitting at the edge of her bed as I watched her tear up with each word she spoke. I tried to assure her that she didn't have to tell me since I could see she was having a difficulty saying some of the things, I mean I don't blame her. We're pretty much strangers but yet she seems to trust me enough to tell me the shit that keeps her up at night.

"With every failed suicide attempt I lost a piece of me, a piece of that little girl who always wanted to be a pilot someday."she said darkly looking into a distance.

"Tell me exactly why you would want to be a pilot," I say genuinely curious.

"I don't know, mannn. It was just the whole idea of flying up in the sky that appealed to me."she laughed lightly.

"Wow, that's weird. But okay. I'm just trying to understand why a nine year old girl who should be dreaming of becoming a ballerina or something, is thinking of being a pilot" I say through fits of uncontrollable laughter.

She joined in the laughter and threw a pillow at me which I effortlessly caught. I threw it back at her and next thing you know we're having ourselves a very hyped pillow fighting .

I couldn't help but feel all weird and giddy as I watched her giggle like a five year old. Her eyes were shut and tears were threatening to come out and boy was she beautiful.

"Oh my word,"she said holding her tummy trying to catch her breath. She crawled to where I was seated also recovering from my laughter and she looked at me.

An unknown emotion flickered in her blue eyes as she looked at me. I took the time to admire every single detail of her face as she sat so closely to me. I could see her cheeks flush and she looked away.

I smiled to myself. Knowing the effect I have on the feisty newbie. And to think she has the same effect on me is just crazy. I remember how when I caught her staring at me in the garden I felt my pulse quicken,how she has a weird of occupying my thoughts.

I laid back on her small bed and stared at the ceiling. And she crawled and laid next to me. I could feel her eyes on me. I smiled.

"Wipe that stupid grin off your face, " she said with some sass.

I laughed.

"Now aren't you a ray of sunshine," I said out only to have her swat my arm.

I laid back on her tiny bed, looking at the ceiling. I couldn't wrap my mind around the thoughts of today. I left here thinking I'd probably turn up but somehow I seem to have spend the night having the most fun I have had in a really long time, and I'm not exaggerating when I say a real long time.

"Tell me something nice," she said laying back down next to me. I had to force myself to ignore the way my pulse quickened as she put her head on my chest.

"Is that you asking me to tell you a bed time story?" I questioned her, chuckling lightly.

"You could always sing me a lullaby if you're terrible storyteller," she said and even though I could not see her face I could hear her smiling.

"No thank you, my singing voice is far too angelic. Now I'd have the whole world grovelling at my feet if I start singing." I smirked.

"Angelic?"she said trying her best to hold in laughter which she was terrible at and she ended bursting out laughing.

"When I was eight, I had a puppy. Midnight. I loved him so very muchh. I don't think I have ever loved anything that much. I got him as a birthday gift from my nana. I remember wanting a puppy for as long as I could remember and when I finally got him I took him everywhere with me. I even wanted to take him to school with me. I slept with him, I ate with him, which always got me in trouble with Rosa. She hated him, I don't blame her though because she was the one who cleaned up his poop. Everytime Owen went for music learns I went out to the park to play with Midnight. I spent every single moment I had with Midnight and nothing else mattered." I smiled at the distant memory trying to my best to ignore the nostalgia that came with it.

I could feel the soft snores coming from Summer indicating that she's fast asleep but I didn't move in case I woke her up.

But as I let my thoughts run wild I could feel my eyes lids getting heavier and I gave in to the blissful sleep that took over my senses.

...

I woke up to Bia staring at me like creep.

"The fuck are you doing?" I snapped.

"Ohh somebody is clearly not a morning person,"she giggled probably not realizing how annoying it is to have to deal with rainbows and unicorn attitude first thing in the morning.

Summer groaned next to me as I tried to get off her bed without waking her. Thankfully she just hugged her pillow and continued to sleep. I put on my boots and left without a word because I knew if I was to say anything Bia would ask me a million questions and frankly I was not in the mood.

I walked to my room and when I got there I found Zeke laying on my bed.

"You must've had some night to walking in at this time." He said and I didn't even bother gracing that with an answer.

Heyyyyyyyyy y'all 📍
It's been a while, I guess.
Hope y'all been good and y'all been safe, you know with this whole covid thing going on. Well this chapter is certainly the longest thus far. Went an extra mile today...I hope y'all love my story. Ilyallsm😭❤️

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