Industries (on hold)

How about some humor to lighten the mood

I woke up, for the umpteenth time in the hospital. I cough, and my family wakes up. They look terrible. (I hadn't looked in a mirror yet). My mom looks at me, and starts to cry. "Wha-" is all I manage to say before she comes and hugs me in a bear hug bigger than an actual bear can give.
Justin screams for a nurse to come in. I finally get my mom off me and a team of doctors comes in. They stick needles in my legs, stick all these pads over me that are connected to wires, shining lights in my eyes, screaming in my ears. I scream, "ENOUGH! NO MORE! ITS TOO MUCH STUFF!" I cross my arms like a toddler pouting. The doctors look at me in complete and utter shock. "Okay look," I sigh, "I know that was kind of abrupt, but I just woke up two minutes ago, and you just start doing all this stuff to me! I'm sorry if I offended you or whatever, but I mean, at least I didn't pee or bleed on you!" My whole family is now crying. "We- we thought you'd never speak again." one of the doctors stutters. "What?" I ask. "It turns out that you had a panic attack, but it was 20 times more severe than it was before. When you collapsed, you hit your head on a table, and caused some damage to your skull. Speaking was an abstract idea until now. Well I mean, it still would be if you hadn't spoken. We weren't even sure if you would wake up for months!" Another doctor says. "So I'm like, a superhero?" I ask. "Well, yeah if you want to say it like that." "COOL!" I sing. "When I was little, i always loved the idea of superheroes. I liked that normal people could become new people in just a change of fate." I could say a lot more, but the doctors have lost interest and are now checking my heart rate and brain activity. "So, April. We have to have a discussion with you and your parents." my family and I all nod our heads. "So we need to see what you want to do about the prank calls. Would you like to punish the children who pulled the prank?" "Yes." We all say unanimously. "Well then." The doctor said. "Would you like execution or a jail sentence? The severity of the prank was high enough that you can submit an execution form." "April can decide." Said my mother. "Well..." I thought, "I would like to submit an execution form. I've suffered enough thanks to these kids. They deserve to suffer too." I declare. "Alrighty then. I'll submit the form after I deal with another patient. Now get some rest." the doctor says as he leaves the room. I sit back in my bed, satisfied with my decision.