Mikasa's pov
I went to school as planned so I could see Jean later. It was only the start of the day but Sasha and Connie looked like it was already done and over with, like he had already left. I wanted to talk to them since class hasn't actually started, we were just talking in our classroom. I sat backwards on The chair in front of them,
"you guys don't look as happy as normal, what's the matter?" they didn't answer the question, instead they both pulled out a cream envelope with their names on it,
"you got a letter from him?" Connie nodded, they both must really not want to talk to anyone today,
"are you the only ones?" Sasha shook her head
"he gives them to you after he talks to you and we always meet up before school, its practically our own tradition so we talked then." I wanted to cheer them up but I knew I couldn't or rather I knew I was incapable of doing so,
"cheer up guys, he's still here he hasn't left yet" I said as I walked back to my desk,
"whose he with now?" I asked them, the looked at each other, "he should be finishing up with Reiner and Bertholdt" Connie said.
>>> After class
"hey um Mikasa, the teacher told us to take these to the storage room" Reiner said.
"yeah okay?" I didn't really know what to say to that, I mean why would the teacher ask me of all people. We walked out of the classroom and into the corridor.
I remember the last time I was alone with Reiner and what he said about Jean
"Sasha told me that Jean had already talked to you" he looked at me weirdly
"uhm said his goodbyes" he nodded "he gave me a weird letter as well, just a bunch sappy shit, ruining his reputation to be honest" we got to the storage rooms
" why would you talk so much shit about someone I was dating?" I asked
"you aren't dating anymore are you?I doubt he would take you back after that even with his newly found reputation " he laughed. I looked down
"how do you know? You weren't at the party" he looked over at me
"Well of course I know, I paid Floch to make out with you, he hated Jean a lot so it was only fitting. He broke you guys up so I could have you. All. To. Myself." he pinned me against the wall. I tried not to roll my eyes but even Jean's dad did better than this, he was just such an amateur,
"you see ever since that day in the woods when Jean got lost, you've been the only thing on my mind and my dick's mind for that matter" he moved closer to me and I could feel his dick prodding at me
"the best thing was I knew where he was the whole time" I looked down
"you know I was going to let have some fun with me out of pity, but you took it too far" he looked at me as if I was spouting nonsense
"for someone who 'likes me so much' you should at least know my out of school hobbies : boxing!" I kicked his dick and broke his nose
"when you get to the hospital tell them you got beat up whilst committing sexual assault, scumbag"
I spat on him and left. When I came back to the classroom Armin and Annie weren't there, I knew where they were or I knew who they were with.
I was sat at the back of the classroom when they came back, I didn't go and talk to them because they came over to me, tears in their eyes and all,
"Its a lot harder that we thought" Armin said, I liked that they actually appreciated Jean
"it's only for a few years" I said, they both smiled,
"I'm coming back to the gym by the way" Annie said, "the old Miss unbeatable against the new one, it's what he would've wanted" that was Annie?
"I'll be waiting in the ring" we all laughed, they pulled some chairs around the table and we just talked. Sasha and Connie joined us and we started playing cards, cheat, chase the ace, wars whatever.
When Eren and Christa came back from their turn it the sun was setting.
I started to lose hope that he would even say goodbye to me because it was already five o'clock,
"2 threes" I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket, I got it out immediately. I had just got the text saying to come to the roof,
"you guys know you don't have to wait for me?" they all got up and pushed me out the door
"we'll be here when you finish."
On the roof
"Jean?" I called, I saw him on the ledge looking into the sunset, he turned around and revealed the letter in his hand. I took it from him,
"read it, not aloud but read it." he sounded sad, I opened the letter
' Dear Mikasa,
I'm leaving soon so I wanted to say goodbye and tell you you can do what you want with the paintings, tell you to teach Eren boxing in my stead, but most of all I wanted to say sorry, sorry I didn't tell you everything every time you asked, sorry I couldn't be there for you when you were constantly there for me, sorry, sorry I lashed out on you all those times, sorry I was an egotistical bastard, sorry I couldn't see through my own mask, I'm sorry and thank you, thank you for the best six months ever, thank you for constantly being there for me when I wasn't there for you, thank you for seeing through the mask, thank you for always thinking about me and my health, thank you being you. I'm sorry I couldn't be me. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough. I love you so much, please don't ever give up like I did.
Jean Kirschtein '
When I looked up Jean was stood on the ledge again, I finally understood. He wasn't going to England, he was going to kill himself Just before he left. I dropped the letter and ran up to him,
"I love you" he stepped backwards and fell.
"JEAN!"
YOU ARE READING
Picking up the pieces - a JeanKasa story
ФанфикHe hides his emotions behind a smile and a bad attitude. The teachers hate him and his group of friends is very small. You think you know him but you have no idea... At home Jean's brother and mother both died leaving him with depression, anxiety a...
