Lovesick | JERRIE

2.

"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck." Jade jumped out of her bed... or actually the mattress on the floor.

"Aaa, Jade, it's my free day, don't make unnecessary noise from the morning." Leigh scolded her and buried her head under the pillow to muffle Jade's current exclamations.

"I will be so late for the interview." she complained while buckling her jeans.

"Then take a cab like a normal person." her roommate reasoned; still sleepily.

"If I had money for a cab, would I go to an interview for a job, Lee?" Jade half heartedly joked.

It was not likely Jade's taste to sit at home without working for her own money, neither to ask someone for favours. But when she got kicked out of her apartment, she had no other choice. The options actually were to stay at Leigh's or to go back to South Shields. And Jade was already too far to go backwards the path. So, when her best friend was nice enough to offer the place, Jade couldn't refuse. Even tho, now she was sleeping on the floor because the apartment was too small, even Leigh was spending her nights on the couch. It was hard to get a grip after university. Although, the Jamaican was looking up for a bigger place with a bed at least. While the brunette couldn't relate. Every job that came to her, somehow slipped off past her hands.

"Jade, shut up, please. It's early as fuck."

"It's 9 a.m." Jade said back.

Leigh-Anne didn't answer anything further. She was too relaxed into sleep from the tiring week to pay attention to her friend.

Jade urgently toured the room in search for one of her tops. Wasting wholesomely ten minutes. At last she snatched one of Leigh's tank tops. Okay, it was not the best outfit to show up at an interview but hey, she didn't go naked tho.

The brunette flew out of the building. Fuck, she forgot the key for the lock of her bike. Approximately, she would lose the same time if she just caught the subway. So, the crowded train felt enough. Not to mention how many times she got squeezed by the amount of sweaty bodies in it.

When Jade finally arrived at her destination - some agency that she would have applied in - she was late.

"It's literally only ten minutes after the deadline." she was trying to think of a something that will excuse her in front of the CEO.

"Miss Thirlwall, if you come late for work in general... the boss won't be impressed to hire you." a woman from the workers was explaining to Jade for a millionth time.

"I want only five minutes, okay? Five minutes and—"

"The CEO is not even in the building anymore." passing by man in a suit told them when heard their conversation.

"Fuck." Jade cursed but quickly realized she had to be polite. "Sorry..."

But honestly, wasn't the situation for one big hard FUCK?!

When Jade went outside again, she sighed desperately. It was not enough she was disturbing Leigh while living in the small place but she couldn't afford to pay even half of the rent at least.

Lately, Jade felt absolutely useless. The lack of job was killing all her resolutions and goals. Despite Leigh had her back constantly, the brunette just couldn't sleep calmly knowing that she was kind of a burden. She couldn't keep living with the money her parents were nice enough to send her.

On the way home or actually Leigh's apartment, she hated calling it "home". She didn't contribute in any way to had the right to call it like this. Jade was not eager to return because she had to tell Leigh-Anne about another lost chance. Not as if Lee was going to scold her or something... but Jade was not willing to listen to the same old "don't worry, you will find a job soon". How soon was it?

Jade felt guilt too. Like disappointing herself was not enough but... telling Leigh how just another opportunity had burnt was causing this bad kind of discomfort in her stomach. She was young and smart yet it seemed so hopeless sometimes...

While walking down the boulevard, she spotted a random coffee shop and decided to spend time here. Getting back "home" was not in the first place in her schedule right now. Jade got herself a latte and sat beside the big windows to look outside.

She watched the life on the streets. The cars passing by with high speed along London. Some birds... even they were chained to the sky. And all these people. Jade often wondered if they were happy. Like... this man walking on the other side of the road with green jacket. Was he happy?

At some point, Jade realized she had lost herself in frustrated thoughts. She couldn't know for sure if somebody was happy or not. Hell, she couldn't even figure out if she was happy...

She thought about South Shields... It was so easy back then. Living with mom and dad, the food was always prepared, while she spent the whole day at the playground. But now, when the times were different and Jade knew she was an adult who should be able to handle herself... She never saw a point in going back to South Shields. London was the city of dreams after all.

She unlocked her phone to go indifferently through the socials. Looking through her story feed she paused to watch the full 15-seconds video of one of her favourite singers - Perrie Edwards. Such a beautiful blonde with a wonderful boyfriend and rich dad. Okay, what could be possibly wrong with her? Jade remembered that she had read about Perrie in Daily Mail for her break up with the footballer a few moths ago... but still. Perrie was young, gorgeous and rich. There for sure was a queue of candidates for her heart.

The train of thoughts had completely shaded her vision, so she had to return the story back because she missed it. The short video consisted of someone (probably her stylist) who was filming Perrie while a photographer was taking (presumably hot) pictures of her. Honestly, Jade held her finger on the screen just to stare at this blonde delight a little longer. Her life seemed so perfect exactly like her face.

Woah, and y'all saying God didn't have favourites.

Perrie was for sure an angel fallen from heaven. Her features were sharply sculpted. How she looked flawless from every angle? Jade casually scrolled through her profile. She was not just a singer but also a model, her uncountable contracts and being endorser for so many different brands were providing a steady surface under her feet. Even if in some parallel universe her dad was not a billionaire... she still would be.

Jade locked her phone without closing Perrie's Instagram. It was ridiculously useless to look through the pictures of a celebrity with ideal life. Somebody who obviously didn't know what "jobless" meant... but Jade couldn't blame her tho. Perrie was a lucky girl and she probably worked hard for all of this.

Anyways, Jade had always been the positive type. If something was not meant to be then it wouldn't happen. The bad things occurred to test if people were ready for the next level of their dream life. So, looking the case from the brighter side... if it had one... She tried to lie to herself that the right job didn't pop up yet because the universe had other plans... and Jade couldn't know how right she was.

With half emptied mind she payed and left. Dragging herself all the way up to the shared apartment. Thankfully, Leigh was not at home yet. So, the few minutes of internal agony for Jade were there to prepare her mentally to tell Lee about the bad news. Over and over again. And Leigh-Anne as always would start assuring her and calming her down. Because that was Leigh. She couldn't just leave you to suffer.

Jade sighed. It was draining to be hopeless. She caught her phone to call her mam. When the lock screen disappeared a blonde model took over the whole phone again.

"What can be possibly wrong with you?" Jade asked as if Perrie could hear her through the screen. "What can be your greatest pain, hm?"

She hypnotized zoomed a few pictures to find at least something to call a "flaw" but unsuccessfully. Perrie was staying as perfect as Jade always saw her.

"Maybe you are mad because you missed the new collection of Chanel?" Jade mocked under her nose. "What the fuck can be wrong with you?" she left her phone down on the table again.

The entire wondering about some strangers' lives gifted her a nice headache. She took a pill and drifted off to sleep. Forgot to call anybody but somehow Perrie still lingered in her thoughts. Without any specific reason. The fact she was in London was meddling Jade's mind.

How so two people were at the same city yet had so different lives?