Mr. Horan »n.h«

JUMP

How would you describe your life?
Is it nice, do you live with both parents, do you have siblings and a dog? Do you visit other family members on holidays?

I'm sorry. I shouldn't ask, that's your business - not mine. But my life? Not so swell.

See, I'm not normal. Some call me mentally ill, some call me dangerous, some call me a "ticking time bomb". I have a lot of nicknames, that was after I tried to commit suicide.

Hang?
Jump?
Cut?

Which one?

I tried to jump. I mean what can I say? I was literally pushed by this inner demon. So you're like woah what the hell?

Don't judge. I don't have the "perfect" life. See, my mother despises me. She can't stand me, even though she hides it will a smile. I can feel it, feel the hate vibe. I can hear people talking about me. I can see that I was becoming ugly as hell, and I knew that no one cared. And plus, I have these really bad anger issues that I can't control which means once I break into one of my spells it's like your seeing the anti-Christ. When I go into one of my spells it's like, bye Sophie and hello to whatever the hell it is that I turn into.

So one day, on a bus ride home. I was sitting alone on my transfer when we passed up a bridge that wasn't that far away from my place, right? You're still reading? Alright. Cool. Get this, I saw this bride, the drop high enough to kill me. I felt numb inside, and I knew I was going home to simply nothing.

So, when the transfer dropped us off to the ran down elementary. I walked myself all the way to that bridge, and without hesitation -which is weird as fuck because you think you would be afraid of a hundred foot drop- I walked right off the ledge. Well, it took a little more time. I was, I guess you could say, I was a little nervous.

Hey, don't hate. I'm cutting it short.

Anyways, after that. Surprise! It didn't kill me.

Plot twist, huh?

Anyways, it didn't kill me. I was still alive but on the edge of death, and trust me - I wasn't hanging on either. I wanted to let go. So.. After I got out of the hospital they put me into this psych ward, made me to be this crazy bitch. My parents - well parent. My mum decided that the best thing for me would to be to move from the shitty small town and head to a larger city.

Start a new school-
Meet new people-

It all sounded like shit to me but in the process of going to a counselor I got my confidence back, I got my smile back. It was a big help.

Thanks.

So now, we're driving to this house that we just bought. No one around here knows about me and my actions, everyone exept my dear old mother who's right now talking my head off about school -