𝙑𝙪𝙡𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 (𝙀𝙡𝙞𝙤 𝙋𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙢𝙖𝙣)

10

~Vulnerable~
10:

I wake up the next morning. I feel someone next to me and my heart began to beat fast.

It was real. It wasn't a dream. He's with me. We are okay again.

I roll over to see him fast asleep.

I feel myself grow happier. All of the pain I felt was suddenly lifted from my shoulders and I was okay once again.

I take in what he looks like. His hair is messy, his cheeks are a bit stained from tears, he has on no shirt, and he's so fucking adorable.

He hums and scoots closer reaching out to me. Obviously, I embrace him.

I run small shapes on his back as he wakes up.

"Your still here." He whispers opening his eyes.

"I'll always be here Elio. Always."

__

We agreed to never just jump to conclusions like that again.

Maybe this was a good thing.

I had never felt a stronger relationship with him.

Though, the down side was that I never wanted to let go. It's just gonna hurt us both even more when I have to go.

The time was growing closer and closer. I still had about one month and a half left, but it still scared me.

I don't get much time alone to enjoy things with Elio. I need that. I need to feel what it's like.

I want to know what it's like for me and him to be the only ones around, free to do whatever we please. There would be no one to judge, comment, or see anything. It would just be us.

I could have that. I could have that if I was just able to stay and live with Elio.

We could move out and live together. We could have our own house just to ourselves with no one else.

No one would be able to tell us what we could and couldn't do.

That's what I want.

That's what I have always wanted.

But I had a life outside of Italy. I had friends and family. I had a home, a room, a perfectly fine bed waiting for me.

But it was a bed that I did not want. I want the bed that is upstairs right across from Elio's. I want the dinner table that sits outside perfectly shaded by the house. I want the piano that's sat in the living room so I can listen to Elio play all day.

I want everything.

But maybe, I would want the house that waited for me. Maybe I would if it meant that Elio lived in it with me.

Yes. Of course I would. Anything I do is better with Elio. He sets my soul on fire.

We have been hanging out all day.

Right now, I'm watching him write his music. I loved how focused he would get. I really liked when he would sit in front of the window and the sun would shine into his face making his skin light up. You could see every freckle scattered on his nose and cheeks. You could see the darkness under his eyes just a little better.

He was so beautiful. And I intended on letting him know that.

He had been walking around all day in only shorts. He's driving me insane.

I just wanted to hold him close and kiss him until we can't anymore.

I want to touch him and tell him over and over again how happy he makes me and how beautiful he is.