𝙑𝙪𝙡𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 (𝙀𝙡𝙞𝙤 𝙋𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙢𝙖𝙣)

11

~vulnerable~
11:

It's been so good. So good that it's starting to scare me. Everything is perfect.

My time in Italy is coming to an end. One month.

I have one month until the only time I can hear Elio is over the phone, and the only time I can see him is through pictures that he mails to me.

We haven't brought up me leaving in a while. I don't want to either. When we talk about it, it just gets all sad.

But, if he needs to we can talk about it.

I don't want to do this.

Why do I have to leave?

I'm so attached. I'm connected to him by the hip. I need Elio all the time. He's all I need.

I go to look for him. I don't even want to wait a second that I could spend with him.

When I find him, he's asleep on the couch in the living room. He has on just his shorts again and I smile at the sight of him.

I walk over and sit on the edge. The sun hit him perfectly, his freckles showing very well. His eyes flutter open.

"Hi." I whisper.

He sniffles and sits up just a little. He wouldn't make eye contact.

"Are you okay?" I ask moving the hair from his face.

He continues to stare down. "Mhm. I'm fine."

"Elio.." I whisper lifting his head with my fingers under his chin.

He doubles over wrapping his arms around my waist with his head in my lap. I hear him sob loudly.

I grab his arms and pull him to sit up. He quickly latches back onto me, burying himself into me, as if he could just disappear.

"It's okay to not be okay Elly-belly." I pet his hair.

He pulls back and wipes his face. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize for having feelings." I say. "So what's up?"

"I um.. I don't want you to go." The tears are coming again.

My heart breaks.

There comes a time in a relationship, you notice how much they love you. How much they care, and feel for you. It all comes out in one moment.

Even though ours wasn't as special as everyone else's, this was still our moment.

He didn't plan a whole amazing date, give me flowers, shower me with compliments, get all dressed up, and confess his undying love for me.

It was real, and raw. It was the moment I feel he was most vulnerable to our relationship.

It was also when I realized how much I cared for him. When he was hurting, so was I.

"I don't want to go either." I sigh and pull him into my chest as we both cry. "But hey, once I'm old enough I'm coming back here. I promise Elio."