Sydney didn't have much, but that was fine with her. She didn't need much. Growing up on the Washington coast in a lonely beach town, working quietly behind the scenes was what she was good at. Living on the beach was much less glamorous than most p...
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Like the sun we will live to die and then ignite again.
August, 1989
"Long time no see, Susie Q." Sydney greeted Sue with a quick hug as she stepped in to her boss's office. "You too. I hope you've been keeping busy." Sue smiled, sitting down at her desk and indicating for Sydney to do the same. "Yeah, I'm trying. Been pulling double duty at Beth's, and it seems as though every one of their appliances decided to go tits up at the same time. I've been working off the clock just to help keep their doors open before we leave." The next tour was the reason the two women were meeting here. Susan needed to go over details with her about their trip across the country with their new bassist. "They're lucky to have you. Then again, so are we." Sydney narrowed her eyes momentarily at the way Susan said that last sentence. With horror she wondered if she had somehow found out about the kiss. Guilt threatened to swallow her whole and she felt two inches tall sitting across from the woman whose trust she had betrayed. "Thanks." She said, trying to keep her voice from trembling. "I hear you've been busy with Alice 'n Chains as well. You must be superhuman to manage two bands and make it look so effortless." Susan laughed dryly and gave a wave of her hand. "Honestly, the extra work has been a huge help in dealing with the breakup. At least now I don't have anyone to complain when I bring my work home with me every night." "Wait... did you say breakup?" Sydney asked, heart sinking even further. Did she know? "Chris didn't tell you? We... ended things, about a week or so after you all got back from Europe." "N-no, he didn't. Sue I'm so sorry." She said honestly, leaning forward. "Sorry for what? You didn't do anything. Honestly, it was a long time coming. Chris and I just... we didn't really have much in common. I think I was just the first girl that he ever dated that wasn't crazy. Anyway... I'm fine. Like I said, it was bound to happen eventually." "Are you going to keep managing them?" She asked, trying to process this information. "Of course. We agreed to be adults about it and stay friends. One thing we both still do have in common is what we see the band doing in the future. Our little corner of the world has some pretty big things happening right now." "That's... that's good I suppose. I mean, what I meant to say is it could be worse." She wanted to slap herself for sounding like such an idiot. Why hadn't Chris told her? That day that she pulled him aside to talk to him about what had happened that night in Italy... he had broken things off with Susan by that time and he hadn't told her anything. Suddenly she felt irritated that he hadn't told her. They were supposed to be best friends, and he failed to tell her that he ended a nearly five year long relationship? That was kind of a big deal! She hadn't had many friends in her life but she assumed that was something you told your favorite one, messed up and complicated feelings aside. They finished their meeting, pinning down some important details that had been overlooked last time that would hopefully improve their next tour this coming fall. Sydney wished Sue well, hugging her tightly before exiting her office. It was her way of apologizing without actually saying the words and admitting to what she had done. Was this her fault? Getting in her truck, she pointed it toward Chris's house. She pulled up to the curb a while later and knocked on the front door. Andy answered, immediately pulling her into a one armed hug. "Hey, Sunshine. I sure have missed you." "I've missed you too. How's the album coming?" "Almost ready to start recording." He smiled. He seemed tired. Sydney wondered if he and Xana had been fighting again. Or perhaps maybe the stress of preparing to record Mother Love Bone's first album was catching up to him. "Kick ass. I'm happy for you guys." "Thanks. Hey, if you're looking for Chris he's not here." "Oh. Okay. Will you ask him to give me a call whenever he gets a second?" "Sure thing." She smiled, thanking him and heading back to her truck. "Sunshine." He called after her and she turned. Looking at her for a moment and glancing behind his shoulder, he walked off the steps and closed the distance between them. "He told me what happened in Italy." "Really?!" She exclaimed, her heart jumping. "Oh god, you must think I'm a piece of shit." "I couldn't ever think that of you." He said, his tone incredulous. "Yeah, right. It was wrong and it should have never happened. Now they're broken up and it's all my fault." "Maybe it was bad timing, but them breaking up wasn't your fault. I knew this was going to happen with you two,and I'd be willing to bet money on it happening again." His mischievous smile lit his face up with joy. "You're just as impossible as Christopher is sometimes, you know that?" Andy laughed. "I've gotten to know Chris pretty well since we've lived together. He's different around you." She sighed, shaking her head. "Susan and Adam didn't deserve what we did. That's the long and short of it." "Whatever you need to tell yourself to sleep at night. Just know that when it finally happens, I called it first." It was impossible not to return his smile as she climbed back in to her truck and started the engine. Andy was such a simple guy, yet also complex in a way. She recognized a lot of things in him... like darkness. A shadow behind his eyes that she knew came from from a painful place deep inside. Maybe that's why he dedicated his time to entertaining everyone around him. It was his way of turning that darkness into something good, the way Sydney did when she fixed things. Sometimes the only way to survive it was to use it as a tool to create something good.
