Short Stories

Too late (ENG)

You may delay, but time will not, and lost time is never found again.

- Benjamin Franklin

It all started when I was younger. I lived in the house not too far from my school. Every morning, I walked from my house to my school and back. It was always the same path and it was always around the same time every day. So, you know, after a while you would notice certain patterns and certain people that you see every morning. On my walk to my school I had to pass this one giant house. It has a huge garden and it was just immense. Well every morning there was a dog waiting for me at the gate. It was a really big German Shepherd with a really low bark and really intimidating teeth. It used to really scare the hell out of me and I hate it. I absolutely hated it but not the dog. I hated the fact that it could scare me because I knew that it was just defending its home and defending its owner but it still just terrified me.

So, I made a deal with myself. Because I hated the fact that it scared me and I wanted to be fine with the fact that there was a barking dog there, I made a pact with myself. I made a promise to myself that one day I was going overcome the fear of the barking dog and just stand at the gate and pet it. It also would be nice to be able to walk past the gate without clenching my jaw and getting ready to run. I just wanted to be not afraid anymore.

So, days pass. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. And those months turned into years. After all this time I still haven't got rid of my fear for the dog. I still was terrified of it and I couldn't walk past it without feeling this intense fear inside of me. Just the longer I waited the worse it got. Because in my brain I had created this image of the dog and made myself even more scared. Because the image that I had in my head of the dog wasn't as scary as it actually was. But it sure did feel that way.

One cold winter morning, it was icy on the roads. I remember that I was walking past the gate and I tensed up before I even heard the dog. You know I was ready to be scared even though there was nothing to be scared about. Because you see the thing is the dog wasn't there anymore. My entire life I have been so scared of my dog and I don't even know why because it never did anything to me. But now it was gone. And it all just seems so weird you know? Because it just seemed so insignificant now even though it was such a big part of my life for all those years. I walked with fear every day and now it didn't matter anymore. And I couldn't fix it you know. I had wasted all those years that I had the chance to get over my fear. And now, even if I wanted to, I couldn't fix it anymore.

I always told myself well tomorrow I'm going to do it. Tomorrow I will take all my courage and stand up against the dog. I'm going to stop at the gate look that stupid dog in the eye tell him that I'm not afraid of him. And who knows, I might even pet him. But I always made up an excuse. 'Not today because I'm too late for school.' Not today because it's too cold to stand still for too long.' 'Not today because he seems in a bad mood.'

That day, it changed me. It might not seem like a big thing to happen you know it's a dog I didn't know that disappeared. But I realized that every time I procrastinated something, it meant that I had a day less to achieve my goals and dreams. And it sucks because I absolutely love dogs and I think they're cute and I really want to pet him. But because I procrastinated every day, I ruin my chance to befriend him because it never occurred to me that one day it might be too late to even try. That one day it might be too late for me to try to overcome the fear that this animal brings me. It might be too late to resolve my issues. I realized that if I did not start with trying to achieve something and I just will tell myself that I will do later, the only thing that that get me is another day without success.

From that day on I never really procrastinated anymore. I got more self-control, and I would tell myself more often no you're going to do it now, and not later. Every time I caught myself thinking 'but I have to enough time tomorrow' I would take three deep breaths and just get up and do it now. And let me tell you that changed my life. I got so much more done. It might've been the best thing to ever happen to me.

Especially if you look at where I am now in my life, and where it got me.