Attention Lover

53

(TW: sexual assault/abuse mentions)

(Jimin's POV)

First a period emergency and middle school bullies, then the sex talk with a teenager? Why did I already feel like a parent?

"Are you sure you're even ready for that?" I asked, trying not to sound condescending. I sat in his desk chair, right across from him. He had a lot of sport paraphernalia in his room. The posters of famous soccer players on the wall and the mini net and ball on the ground. When I looked over at his shelf, he had a nice collection of awards. On another wall, there were 4 sets of hooks, each holding up different skateboards. He was the kind of boy I wanted to be growing up, the kind my dad would've wanted. Now is not the time to think of those things, Jimin! I reprimanded myself, trying to refocus. "I mean, have you even thought about protection?"

I figured that what ever I was gonna say, wouldn't deter him from doing something he set his mind to. So I could at least make sure he was being safe in the process.

"No...I didn't think about it to be honest." He replied shly, messing with his fingers. "And I'm not sure if I'm ready for that, but it doesn't really matter."

"Geum! You can't do anything without protection, what if she had std's-" I began but he narrowed his eyes at me. "Not that I think your girlfriend would ever have one!" I quickly cleared up and he relaxed a bit. His pride was obviously gonna be an issue here. "Okay but what if she got pregnant or something, not having protection isn't an option."

"Well I heard there's a pull out method-"

"No, absolutely not- Wait wait wait, did you just say it doesn't really matter if you're ready?"

"So where do you get condoms from? The grocery store? Can you buy me some?" He completely dodged my question. I decided that I would circle back to it.

"I'm not going to buy you condoms. You know how much trouble we could get in? Or at least that I could get in?!" Besides for the fact that I wasn't sure he was even supposed to be doing anything like that. Is it okay to let a teenager have sex? My childhood wasn't exactly something to be mimicked so I wasn't sure how these things were supposed to go. But if his parents didn't want him doing it, then it was probably for the best then right? I'm sure many teenagers could do it and be fine but what happens if something happens, that would be on me for helping. "Is there a rush to do this now? Especially if you're not ready?"

"Well...she wants to do it. And some of my guy friends have already done it and they talk about it all the time. It's kind of embarrassing that I haven't."

"What?! That's not embarrassing. Some people don't lose their virginity's till they're way into their adulthood. And that's perfectly fine, there's no right age to lose it at. I think the ideal time would be when you're an adult and mentally and emotionally stable since sex can be a lot and it has risks...especially for a guy and a girl because of the pregnancy thing. Those risks can be better dealt with by an adult. I don't think teenagers who do it should be condemned but you definitely should not feel bad if you don't do it, it's still early. Plus you definitely shouldn't be having sex just because you feel pressured to do it, it should only happen if it's something you want."

"What guy my age wouldn't want to do it. It's basically what everyone wants right?" He replied but I noticed how he didn't say he wanted to do it.

"That's not true." It was starting to feel like he only wanted to meet expectations that others had, and that he had for himself...and not like he truly wanted to. "You don't have to have sex or even want to have sex just because other people do or because you think you should."