His Leave (z.s.)

December 31 2014 (3)

As Harry approached the table where Zayn was, he didn't notice him at first. He was too busy in conversation with the most beautiful blonde girl he'd ever seen.

Harry didn't care though, he was his still and he wanted her to know that. He walked up behind him and leaned in toward his ear.

Harry: "I miss you, can we talk?"

Zayn noticed the voice immediately and cut off the girl he was talking to, turning toward Harry with a sigh of relief that he didn't know he was holding in.

Zayn: "mhm come on"

They retreated upstairs, knowing Louis wouldn't mind in the slightest, especially if it were just them. Once they made it to one of his guest bedrooms, they sat on the bed, the only light being the slight light from the window.

Harry: "I don't like seeing you with those girls"

Zayn: "well my boyfriend won't talk to me so I've gotta keep myself busy yeah?"

Harry: "not with them"

Zayn: "come on, is that all you brought me up here for?"

Harry: "no...I guess I just...I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Lottie. I just feel so alone sometimes and I'm afraid you'll think I'm too clingy."

Zayn: "you are clingy babe, but I also signed up for that. I love that about you."

Harry: "I'll try to back off some, it's just...I dunno, I feel like if I don't have your affection I lose my mind."

Zayn: "all it takes is a simple 'hey z, gimme a kiss' haz...not that hard babe"

Harry: "okay but I'm always asking you, I just feel like you never want it."

Zayn: "I'm just not as forward baby"

Harry: "you were before, I don't know what I did wrong to make a switch turn off but at this point, I can physically feel you falling out of love with me."

Zayn: "stop saying that."

Harry: "no, it's how I feel. And this is exactly why I wanted to call the relationship therapist, cause you don't listen to me. You want me to tell you what's wrong, but then you shut me down."

Zayn: "you know what, I'm not fucking perfect okay?! I know that's what you want, and I know that's what you think I can be, but it's not me."

He got up to leave, moving toward the door at a quick pace before Harry stopped him by grabbing his wrist.

Zayn: "what?!"

He yanked him in, falling into his chest in one of the closest hugs they've both ever shared. Zayn wrapped his arms around Harry, holding him close cause he knew he needed it. He gave in, keeping him tight until he was ready to let go.

Zayn: "what's wrong?"

Harry: "everything"

Zayn: "I just don't get what I-

Harry: "stop. just hold me."

Zayn reluctantly did, not wanting to seem anymore distant than he already was.

When Harry broke from the hug he had eyes full of tears and Zayn looked at him sympathetically.

Zayn: "you know I hate when you cry"

Harry: "the deeds been done, just go hang out with your side hoes. I'll be here if you need me."

Zayn just huffed, he had absolutely no desire to put up a fight anymore. He was exhausted.

When Harry heard Zayn shut the door, he collapsed back onto the bed with a sigh of frustration, and soon after the tears followed suit.

He didn't realize how fast time had passed until a soft knock hit the door and made him jump.

Liam: "haz? you in there?"

Harry: "yeah"

He saw the door handle wobble as he opened it and saw Liam looking concerned as he walked toward the bed.

Liam: "the ball drops in 10 minutes lad"

Harry just shrugged

Liam: "you don't wanna come watch with everyone?"

Harry: "what's the point?"

Liam: "I dunno, I guess...just to bring in the new year with a positive gesture"

Harry: "not for me. I can't get zayn to love me."

Liam: "you've been dating for 3 years"

Harry: "he's falling out of love Liam, it's all over his face."

Liam: "I don't wanna hear it, cause it's far from the truth. Now let's go downstairs and celebrate"

Harry: "celebrate what? the fact that I'm not gonna get a New Years kiss? Yeah, love that."

Liam sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed.

Liam: "dwelling isn't gonna fix it"

Harry: "every time we try to fix it, he just gets pissed again and leaves"

Liam: "maybe he's just overwhelmed"

Harry: "he's always overwhelmed Liam, and I know this is making it worse, but I just wanna give him love, and he pushes me away."

Liam: "he's not trying Harry, we just had a long talk downstairs and he looks hurt. He loves you more than he's loved anyone."

Harry: "I just wanna be held."

Liam: "he's sitting on the couch alone, so go cuddle up to him and tell him you love him. You have to start somewhere, no more hiding."

Harry huffed, knowing he wasn't gonna get away with staying upstairs all night. So reluctantly he got up and followed Liam downstairs.

As soon as he came past the wall he saw Zayn sitting on the couch watching the live performances in Times Square.

Liam: "he's been waiting for you, go get him"

Harry nodded, finding all the courage he had left stored deep down inside him and plopped down on the couch where he wanted to be.

Zayn habitually put his arm behind Harry.

Harry: "I'm sorry bub. I know I'm overwhelming you and that's what's making you fall out of love with me. I promise I'll be better."

Zayn: "nobody said I was falling out of love with you Harry, that's the last thing that should be on your mind. I know you're sorry baby, calm down yeah?"

Harry: "I just feel like a douche"

Zayn: "I'm a douche, for not giving you the love you deserve. I promise I'll be better, and this time I mean it yeah?"

Harry just nodded. It felt like a huge weight was lifted from his shoulders as he heard the ball drop and the people clap around him.

Zayn: "kiss me baby"

Harry felt the butterflies erupt in his stomach for the first time in a long time as they brought their lips together in the most forgiving kiss.