like real people do./ arvin russell

0.5

when my dad died in december, i thought it was going to be the only day i would have seen crying so hard to where his lungs seemed like they were tearing apart, but i was wrong.

it all happened in slow motion, like a train wreck, everyone can see it and everyones effected by it, but it goes in slow motion to where you don't even know if you can call it a wreck, maybe just, an unfortunate occurrence.

it started with a long bang and i shot up in my bed, harry was screaming for me so i ran out as fast as i could to find sheriff's all over my living room, one was holding harry but he let him go to run towards me, i picked him up immediately. harry wouldn't stop screaming, he wanted it to stop, i wanted it to stop, it felt like my life was being ripped apart again.

"arvin what's going on!?"

he didn't shed a tear and that was the most terrifying thing about the entire situation, there was not one tear that left that mans eyes as it happened. he was being handcuffed and forced around and harry's crying took over the sounds in the living room.

"remember when i told you i did a lot of things i regretted in the past?"

i nodded, not understanding at all because of the circumstances, it was nearing 4am and the last time i had checked on the boys they were sleeping peacefully on the couch, nothing was wrong with them, they were fine, and i went to bed peacefully knowing that everything was fine.

the cop that held arvin and brought him to his feet, a plain, cold stare sat on his face in a way i didn't like, he looked at me, and i had recognized his face somewhere. my daddy had gotten arrested many times in his life while i was around and i knew most of the sheriff's that took him in, but this one, he had a look like no other, one i couldn't take my eyes off, this was personal. arvin had done something that ruined someone's personal life and this sheriff must have been involved somehow.

"you can't take him! you can't take him! you just can't!"

harry's screaming brought me back into reality, he was practically trying to rip himself out of my arms to go towards arvin, but i knew i couldn't let him, no matter how much it broke me to see him this way, he couldn't go towards arvin, he didn't deserve to be in this mess at only 12 years old but i couldn't stop them, i couldn't save him.

and then it happened, and the truth leaked out slowly as arvin looked at me, he wouldn't look away from me, a broken look in his eye as he saw the condition we were in and the situation he had brought upon us.

"arvin russell, you are under arrest for the murder of reverend preston teagardin."

the noises had stopped, like i was watching a silent movie all alone, but i could feel myself yelling and i could feel harry digging his face into the crook of my neck to muffle his sobs, i myself, was sobbing uncontrollably because how could i be so stupid, to let arvin turn out to be this way, how could i let him do the things he's done without any punishment sooner, why did i let him get so close to the only family i had left. i could here him, i could here arvin trying to yell at me, trying to get my attention as i cried harder than i thought i ever could. my heart was breaking but arvin still kept that same cold look, holding back tears i knew he had.

"natalia please don't cry, don't cry natalia you here me...and harry, harry i'm coming, i'll come back, i promise...i'll always protect you!"

and just like that, as fast as arvin russell had walked back into my life, he walked out.

harry had fallen asleep around 6 and i called his teachers to let him know he wouldn't be going to school today, i also called my work and told them i wouldn't be working today, my manager tried to get me to tell her what was wrong but everytime i tried to speak it felt like my head was going to explode, so i gave up and moved on.

and then i sat. i sat on the couch looking at the blank wall, harry was sleeping peacefully on the smaller couch we had and it made me thankful that he wouldn't have to be awake to see me in so much pain. i knew i was crying but i wasn't sobbing, tears just rolled down my cheeks slowly as everything came back, every little detail, every scream and every cry, it all came back.

i mean everything came back, my life had flashed before my eyes, all the fights, all the love, all the tears, all the friends, all the heartbreaks, all the death. it was all there and i couldn't take it back, i couldn't go back and fix anything no matter how hard i tried, nothing was ever going to be the way i wanted it to be, it was never going to be normal.

when i went to reach for a tissue, arvin's hat was laying on the table right where i had placed it, i chuckled, although the tears still fell from my eyes as i had lifted it up, he had carried this thing with him everywhere since his daddy had passed, he use to tell me when we were younger that he'd give it to his son and not me, no matter how much i wanted the hat, he wouldn't take it off, shoot he could sleep with it everyday if it wasn't so uncomfortable. when i had flipped the hat around i saw that something was taped to the hat so of course, i pulled the little square and flipped it around.

it was arvin and i, at our sixth grade graduation, i felt like it was stupid to "graduate" sixth grade, but arvin felt like it was his biggest accomplishment and he made it his mission to sit next to me, no matter what and he did. he ended up right next to me and the picture caught the exact moment where arvin told me a stupid joke and i interrupted the ceremony with my laughing and he just looked at me in awe, just like he did in the picture harry had shown him weeks ago, it was priceless and the best memory i had with arvin before we continued to be strangers.

i'll always protect you.

///

a/n:

you know i had to throw in a little bit of ~spice~ to this book with bringing in a crime mystery but don't worry loves, arvin and natalia's love story isn't over yet!