(A/N contains suicide and depression, sorry xx)"Joe? Are you ready?!" My mom yells from downstairs. 'Yeah, five more minutes!' I yell back, I look st myself in the big mirror in my room ~Oh Joe, stop trying. You'll never look good.~ (A/N I use '~' for when he thinks something) I grab my beanie and I go downstairs, my mom is already waiting for me. I grab my schoolbag and go in the car with my mom. 'When will I have my own car? I have a driver's license.' "Joe you know we don't have a lot of money, you'll need to save up some money yourself." My mom looks at me and then back at the road, I look outside. I'm going to school on a train, so it'll be sitting alone on the train for 2 maybe 3 months. We arrive at the station and my mom kisses my cheek. "Be safe honey, love you!" 'Yeah, love you too.' I go to the train platform and I sit down on a bench there, I look around and I see a boy who's probably my age staring at me. As soon as he sees I saw him he looks away, I chuckle and then I put my headphones in and I put my IPhone on shuffle. ~It's not like I'm gonna make friends on the first day~ The train is there and I get in, I don't care where I sit as long as I'm alone. The train stopped at where my school is, I got out and sighed. The boy who was staring at me before was there as well, I just walk through. I wanted to be at school as fast as possible, I went to the secretary to say who I was and I went to the playground. I see all these people staring at me and I already feel like I'm being judged, I put my headphones back in and I go sit alone in a corner. The boy from before is there again, he does the same thing as me. I just started looking around, I watched the humans in their natural habitat. ~God, I'm a weirdo~ The bell rings, let the torture begin.
My teacher introduces me to the class. "Guys, we have a new student. His name is Joe Sugg, be nice to him." I just nodded and the teacher pointed at a desk in the back of the class, I sigh and go to my desk. The guy in front of me turned around and just smiled at me chuckled and turned around again, it was the guy from at the train station. I didn't really react, I just doodled a little in my book. Then it was lunchtime I searched for a lonely place and sat down there, a group of "cool guys" ~Do they really think they're cool? Pathetic.~ came over to me. "Hey, new guy. This is our table." I looked up at them. 'Oh really? I don't see your names anywhere, I can sit where I want.' I saw him getting angry, and I enjoyed the show. "Listen you brat, you get away from our table now or I'll make you go away." 'Fine, make me.' The guy took my orange juice and threw it over my head. I tried to stay calm but I couldn't, I started punching him and kicking him. A teacher needed to step in, he backed off and I backed off. "You're insane!" The guy says as he goes sit on "his" table. I got sent to the principal's office, and I had to tell what happened. I got detention, ofcorse. ~great first day so far~ After lunchtime we got back to our classes and I found a sticky note on my desk saying: "Hi, I would love to be friends with you. -the train station guy PS: my name is Caspar Lee" I smiled a little looked at him and I put the note away, everyone in my class is probably scared off me. Except for the train station guy.... I mean Caspar. I took a new sticky note and wrote: 'Hey, sorry but I'm not really into socializing. -Joe' when class was over I got up before him and sticked it to his desk he read the note and looked at me, I gave him a sad smile. And I went to detention, it was so boring. Suddenly a woman from the secretary walks in and goes to the teacher. "Joe Sugg, you are free to go." ~Is this detention or a prison? Probably both~ I leave the classroom and go to my locker to find another sticky note, it says: "Thank me later for getting you out of that prison, I said it was something at home and they didn't recognize my voice. Anyway, I hope we can start with sticky notes. -Caspar" I take the note and smile a little, I run out of the building to the station. I was too late for the train I normally take, so I put my headphones in. I go with my hand trough my hair and I feel that it's still sticky from the orange juice, I sigh because I already know what's going to happen when I get home. The train stops at where I need to get off, I get off the train and I run home. I take out my key and get in the house as quiet as possible, but ofcorse my mom hears me. "Joe? Where have you been?" I walk in and my mom looks at my black eye and my bruises, I look down and she sighs. "Joe, did you get in a fight again?" 'He was being an asshole, so yeah.' My sister Zoe walks in and gives me a hug, I hug her back. 'Sorry I made you guys worry about me, someone got me out of detention. I don't know who.' Zoe looks at me and says "Well, you should be thankful. I'll go get something to take care of your bruises." I sit down at the table and look at my phone, my best friend from then is still my background. I know it isn't good, but I still think about him.
(A/N this is a story from Joe's past, I hope you understand.)
___________________________[past]____________________________________________
I was heading towards Alfie's house (A/N please don't hate me for this >-< if you're a big fan of Alfie don't take it seriously or something, I love Alfie as well but I couldn't think of someone else xp) with my sister, she likes talking to Alfie's mom and Alfie is my best friend. We are there and we knock on the door, Alfie's mom let's us in and I hear Alfie's music. "You can go to Alfie, he's in his room." I nod and go upstairs. I knock on the door of his room. 'Alfie?! I'm here!' No reply, I open the door and I couldn't believe my eyes. He was laying on the ground, with an empty little box off pills. I run to him and sit next to him, I hold him in my arms and start crying. 'Please wake up Alfie, y-you can't l-leave me and everyone else.' I listen if I hear his heart beat but, I hear nothing. I start crying louder and I hug him close, I suddenly just screamed. Because I couldn't take it anymore, Zoe and Alfie's mom came running up the stairs and come in the room. I hear that his mom started crying as well, Zoe runs downstairs and calls an ambulance. I just keep hugging Alfie, not wanting to let go off him. The people run in and take Alfie away from me, I just stayed there. I knew they weren't going to be able to save him, and I was right. He was gone.
_______________________________[present]________________________________________
Zoe walks back in with an ice pack and gives it to me for my eye, she cleans the wounds but I barely feel it. I'm just thinking a lot, about everything that happened today. It was late and after dinner I went straight into my bed, I need to talk to someone but I can't. I don't trust people, including my family. My sister knocks on the door "Joe? Can I come in?" 'Yeah, come in.' She comes in my room and sits on my bed "Joe, I know it's hard but try to forget about it." 'How Zoe? I saw my best friend laying dead in his room! For God's sake, how can I fucking forget that?!' "Hey! Calm down, but at least change your phone background." A tear rolls over my cheek and I quickly wipe it away. 'I-I'll think about it.' I say quietly. "Okay Joe, stay strong okay?" 'Yeah.' She leaves my room and I close my eyes, after a while I fell asleep. This was a hectic day.
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Hey guyssss fyi I don't really ship Jaspar DON'T HATE ME I JUST DON'T but I'm writing this for my two best friends >w< brir5tt zhaliaLight love you guys! Thanks for reading and voting, leave a comment if you'd likd :3 -Ellen <3
