White Diamond x Female reader

WHY?!

TW: Angst,  self-harming, depressive thoughts 

Y/N pov 

Gosh, everything was going so great, but then it happened. All my family died because I was being too careless. The Diamonds left me alone with my family as they started to try and get me to stay at home. My dad slapped me as I got angry and choked them with my water powers. It was too late, and they had already died from consuming too much water and drowning. I sat there on my bed and waited for the Diamonds to pick me up, but it was a long time, and I decided to do something I would regret. I took a knife from the kitchen and cut my wrists, and screamed out in pain as it hurts so bad. I started to cry more as I want the pain to stop. I heard the Diamonds arriving "shit, shit, shit, shit" I thought to myself as there were water and blood everywhere. I used my water powers to put the water somewhere else while I heard the Diamonds stomps and would be in so much trouble. Then I saw that I was able to pick up some of the blood with my powers. As I was amazed, I stuck to my task of cleaning up.

 I was almost finished, and I just had to clean my wounds, but that would hurt like a bitch, wouldn't it? I texted White Diamond on a new gem technology device, "Just getting ready, go talk to steven." White Diamond did a weird emoji before sending a thumbs-up emoji. I heard their stomps become quieter as I then, searched for medical alcohol for my wounds or anything to help my cuts. I searched for a while but then found some bandages and alcohol. I headed to my bathroom, which was our- my most soundproof room, and locked the door. I poured the alcohol on my cut and groaned in pain. After I was done I wrapped bandages around my wrist. I bit my lip a lot as a way to ease the pain just a little even if it hurt me more than comforted me. I then texted White Diamond to pick me up as she sent an accidental close-up selfie than a thumbs up as I could hear stomps coming closer and closer. I was already outside and then got picked up by White Diamond as she asked regular questions like how was my stay and such. I answered with mild responses like 'yes' or 'no' and luckily I wore a big hoodie that covered my arms. The diamonds said their farewells to Steven as we left back to homeworld with my heart pounding and my mind asking all these questions like 'what if I get caught?' , 'will they be bad?', and other thoughts that made me feel guilty. We arrived at Homeworld and I hang out in Whites room as the Diamonds were doing their duties.

Time skipI was very tired and changed my clothes and change my bandages to new ones as I get caught by Whites pearl. She alerted all the Diamonds as I ran away to hide somewhere very quiet and a place I thought they wouldn't be able to find me. I started to cry and tremble as I said to myself "I don't want..to be..punished.." I paused as more depressive thoughts came to my mind 'I'm so stupid!', ' White doesn't even love me.', I felt worthless and so dumb. I made so many mistakes that I can't fix and now they'll hate me even more. I started to cry and whimper.

White POV

They sent out lots of gems to retrieve Y/N since the Diamonds knew the second they were alarmed that she would try and hide or escape their punishments. White didn't care for punishments however she just cared that Y/N was alright and that she would never try something like this again as it seriously hurt White and her heart. None of the gems found Y/N and White took finding her mistress into her own hands and went to a spot she knew Y/N would hide, A quiet flower garden. It was rarely visited as it was a memorial of Pink and it would bring great sadness.

 White was very silent so she could sneak up and not scare her baby. White heard crying and whimpering and it broke her hand as she also heard negative words come out of her lover's mouth. White found her and picked her up as she just hugged Y/N. "Why baby?" She asked her little diamond "Why would you try and hurt yourself then run away." Y/N couldn't speak and just cried before finally saying "I'm sorry White." She had a very shaky and scared voice. White just hugged her as she called off the search and brought them back to her room where she cradled Y/N like a baby and comforted her with these words "Don't worry my little starlight, I won't punish you." Y/N felt better as she also heard White say these words with the truth "I love you." A new type of gems that were healers, Angelites, was sent to watch and heal Y/N. White's little starlight was asleep and was doing well as White took her water diamond and cuddled with her. She then appointed the angelites to continue their own duty as she was left with her starlight and fell asleep. White projected her dream with her gem and it was White and Y/N having sex as White smirked in her sleep.