Osial, widely known as the king of the bedroom. He could make anyone horny. He was so hot. He was wet, and he also made you wet. Woah what a dream come true! You and your friends ningguang, childe and zhongli decided that if osial has 4 bodies, he probably has 4 dicks. That means he could have sex with all 4 of you at once. Woah! How innovative. So you go meet osial, and he says, "before we do the dirty, you gotta bring me 50 servings of adeptus temptation. Thats how i get my appeal." Childe groaned, "AWE SHUCKS! I cant cook! You know what lets just do this another day."
"No" said zhongli. "We have made a contract and we cant break it. Now, lets get cookin."
"I have no experience in the kitchen! Although i used to play cookin mama on my nintendo." said ningguang.
So you guys invaded wanmin restaurant so you could cook. You had to kill xiangling and chef mao first, but it was worth it. then, you ordered childe to cook the shrimp.
"Man this shrimp is bigger than my weewee!" said childe!
"Shut up childe, have some confidence in your manly body" said zhongli.
Ninguang finished cutting the matasuke mushrooms. She quietly came over to you.
"Hey, what do you say we make out in that closet and let zhongli and childe cook?"
"Ok" you said. And then you started making out."
"Man, this matasuke ningguang cut is bigger than my wonkadonk too!" you could hear childe say.
"Speaking of, where is ningguang and y/n? They need to stir the ingredtients together since i cant do that." said zhongli.
You were still making out with ningguang. That went on for a while. You didnt stop, until you heard childe say "we finished cooking! Man, this smells so good. Kinda smells like zhongli yknow."
"Stop hitting on me." said zhongli.
You and ningguang were having a lot of fun together until she said, hey lets play an AWESOME prank on zhongli and childe!
So, lets dress up as chef mao and xiangling, and make zhongli and childe think that they have been resurrected.
"Ok" you said.
"Damn y/n why are you so hot", she replied, while smirking. Then she threw some rocks at you. That is her way of showing affection btw.
So the two of you got into cosplay. You met childe and zhongli.
"WHAHALIUGSDP:OILCBHJALISUHODJ"CG:Il" said childe when he saw you. "Man, i just shit myself! Did chef mao and xiangling just come back from the dead?"
"It appears so" said zhongli.
"On a serious note, i may have shit my pants cus i have cholera and i have a tummyache." said childe. He moaned and ran away.
Zhongli said, "hello xiangling. I noticed that you were the only polearm character until i came along. That cant be right. We need to have a fight to figure out who the best polearm user is"
Childe ran back from the bathroom, with shit dripping down his legs. "A fight? Count me in!"
"Yikes! I dont know how to use a polearm! Zhongli might kill me!" said ningguang.
"Its ok, you can throw rocks at him babe." you said.
So then ningguang (xiangling) fought against zhongli. CHilde wanted to fight, but he actually had to go to the hospital since his cholera was life threatening. So he couldn't fight. Ningguang threw some rocks at zhongli, and he passed out.
"Man, i didnt know zhongli was THAT old" she said. Anyways, the two of you started kissing after that. "y/n, will you be mine?" said ningguang? You accepted. You had a wedding in the hospital so childe could attend. He passed away right after. Ningguang and you ran off into the sunset. Meanwhile, lord osial died of starvation. The end!
