The Secret Youtuber

Chapter Nineteen

Why am I so stupid?

I'm practically throwing myself at guys. Why? Because I'm trying to prove that I'm not in love with Sean. That's all I want to prove. And to do that? I'm throwing myself at guys.

I run my fingers through my hair as I dry off. Three guys. Mitch, some random guy, and Liam. Well, I was extrememly drunk with the random dude and Liam, as they were, so it's not like it exactly counted. I get dressed to go to the hospital. Sean was actually well enough to eat on his own today, and his burns are healing. I want to say that I don't care, but I do.

I drive to the hospital and go up to his room. They're actually letting visitors in, so I should be able to talk for a while with him and his mom. I slip into the room and sit on the couch on the opposite side of the bed. Sean's asleep, and his moms holding his hand. She gives me a kind smile and I smile back. She probably wouldn't smile if she knew what I've been doing.

The thing I ran away from is slowly dragging me back. I worked so hard to get away from it, but it's the only thing I know. I don't know how to do anything else. All of my childhood was ruined by it.

I decide to step out of the room. Besides, there's nothing but awkward silence. I dust off my pants as I walk into the hallway, and someone pulls me backwards and into a corner. I try to fight away, but their grip is firm. They turn me around to face them, and I freeze.

I recognize the cruel smile. Perfectly white teeth all aligned, surrounded by kissable lips. The exact thing I fell for. I meet his royal blue eyes, and he lets out a chuckle. Those eyes are full of hatred.

"Hello, Ainsley." His voice makes me cringe. I try to let out a scream, but he covers my mouth. He looks at his pocket, and I follow his eyes only to see a razor sharp knife peeking out. He nods to a nurse, "She's just sad." He lies. I glare at him and he smiles as she walks away.

He forces me to walk with him to his truck. "Told you I would find you." He smirks. He throws me into the seat and I break down. I begin sobbing, my shoulders shaking as I breathe. He gets in the other side and groans. "Ah, shut up!" He yells, pulling out of the parking spot.

"How?" I manage to ask between all my crying. He chuckles as he turns the corner.

"Little did you know, I have eyes everywhere." He replies with a smirk. What did he mean by that? "And what I mean by that is that your little friend Alex knows me. He didn't know about our history together." He smirks, reaching over and putting his arm around me. "I'm his cousin. He told me all about you."

I begin to get angry with Alex, but I catch myself. He didn't know. He couldn't have known. "Max, what did you do with Alex?" I ask, my voice shaking.

"Don't worry. He found out too much." Max smirks. He pulls into a garage of a really nice house.

He drags me inside, and then takes me down to a basement. The basement looked like a hellhole. I look around as he kicks me inside. "Welcome home." He grunts, slamming the door behind him as he walks away.

I place my hands on the cold, concrete floor and push myself off the ground. There is little to no light in here. I try to make out any shapes of anything, but I can't manage to see.

"Well, you're alone again." I mutter. "Only to be used and hidden away. No getting out of this one." I lean against the wall. This is what I deserve, anyways. I don't know anything but this.

Ainsley, it's best if you just die. You can't handle this. You're not strong anymore.

I'm right. I can't handle this. My emotions, my body, me, I can't. I feel around on the ground for anything. Anything to end it all for me. I can't be under him anymore. I can't handle him. I can't.

And I can't find anything. I give up my search and lean back against the cold wall. "I'll be your cryin' shoulder." I sing, hitting my head against the wall. Slowly, I begin hitting it harder and harder. It hurts, but it will save me. If Max really wants me to live, he'll take me to the hospital. I'd rather be there attached to one thousand IVs than be in here only used for his pleasure.

"Wha--" I hear someone mutter. I stop hitting my head and listen. "What's that noise?" They sound tired.

"Who are you?" I call out into the darkness.

"Ainsley?" I hear the voice reply. It's Alex. I attempt to get to my feet, but end up falling over and hitting my head on the floor. "Oh, god, Ainsley!" He shouts out. He runs towards me, and I feel him touch me, but my eyes are closed and I'm slowly blacking out.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I hear Max yell, and I hear a gun being loaded.

Oh God no.