The things we lost in the rain

Our lows

Chapter 12: Girl next door

4 MONTHS AGO

"Most pregnant women don't travel as much as I do"
I said to Michael and he chuckled, we were on his boat and I got sea sick. So we stayed the rest of the day at home, we were in Jeffrey's Bay at his holiday home.
"This is our final trip"
He said, I nodded because I knew better than to believe that.
"Hey Billy"
I smiled at him and he walked over to my side of the bed.
" I don't want to pressure you or anything, but have you given any thought to what we spoke about?"
He asked, he wants us to move. To Johannesburg. Michael never asks me for anything and he really wanted this, it was a small sacrifice.
" I am just worried about everyone and their jobs"
I said and he kissed my forehead.
Michael" The restaurant plans are done, the market place is almost sorted. The events happening in the farm, they will have jobs Billy. Nothing will change"
Me" What restaurant?"
Michael" The place, I told you about this"
Me" Were you being serious?"
Michael" Yes"
Me" We are opening a restaurant and we are calling it The Place?"
Michael" Hahaha well it's a coffee shop and yes we are"
"It will have a mini book store, bikes for the children, there will be a vegetables stall too"
Me" Where will we get vegetables?"
Michael" Jackson will supply us, he has his own garden in the yard. I know we have a huge yard but it's honestly alarming that you know nothing what is happening there"
Me" Hahaha I am too busy being pregnant"
Michael" Fair"
Me" Who will run all of this?"
Michael" We will hire people, you'll market it obviously and I'll design it. We are sorted, we move to Johannesburg after the opening. That should be a two weeks after Harlow is born"
Me" You really planned this out"
Michael" Yes"
Me" Let me guess; you've already picked out a new home for us"
We both laughed
Michael" And not only that, your new car is waiting for you"
Me" No more sharing a car??"
Michael" Never again"
Me" You should have opened with that one"
"Where is our new home and can I see some pictures"
Michael" We are moving to Bedfordview"
"I hope you like it, it's more modern than our current home. Let me get my laptop and we can look at it, I will probably change a few things but I think you'll love it"
Me" Do I want to know how much you paid for it?"
Michael" Nope, that will just kill the mood"
" We have enough money to afford these things. Trust me"
Michael and I are not married in community of property, we have a prenuptial agreement that is tighter than a virgin. I get a fair amount of money should we get divorced and if he were dies, I get everything and I share it how I see fit. However our children will get 50% of it all and I will get the other 50%.
Me" How about we have sex first, then you can show me our new home later?"
Michael" That's not a bad plan at all"
" If it's sex you want Mrs White, then it's sex you shall receive"
We both giggled and started kissing.

*

"Can we stay here for another day?"
I asked, I love this house. I didn't really feel like going back to PE.
Michael" I have tons of work babe, and an early meeting. You can stay here and I'll drive back tomorrow"
Me" Separation anxiety is a real thing"
Michael" Hahaha I can't stay here, unless I get my team to come up and we work here in the house"
Me" Do I have to cook for everyone?"
Michael" Yes"
Me" Pass. Let's go home babe"
We both giggled
"Your baby is kicking"
Michael" She is probably tired of being in there"
Me" It's not like she is alone"
Michael" Hahaha I'm walking away now"
Me" Mr White!!"
Michael" Hahaha Billy please get dressed"
Me" I don't feel like it hahaha"
Michael" Are you using sex to get me to stay in bed?"
Me" Is it working?"
Michael" No"
Me" Dammit"
He chuckled then walked to the bed, and sat on the edge.
Michael" Are you okay?"
Me" Yes"
"Why?"
Michael" We haven't really spoken about the superfetation and it just feels like you are running away from that reality"
Me" I know but I'm not ready to speak about that"
Michael" Then when?"
" Billy you can't pick and choose what problems you can deal with"
Me" See? You said problem. So if I am enchanted by this discovery then I will feel guilty because it's not what you wanted"
" See my issue?"
Michael" I love you and our children, this isn't something we get to shrugg off and pretend like it's not there"
Me" Michael, they said it might not survive"
" So I don't want to speak about it"
Michael" And just like that we are done?, what about my opinion?"
Me" It's my womb!"
Michael" Wow"
Me" And this is why I didn't want to have this conversation"
Michael" We should get going"
I looked at him and I hated how he was looking at me right now.
Me" I'll stay, you have made a million decisions on my behalf anyway. So I am making this one for myself"
Michael" Really Billy?"
" Is this about the move? Why exactly are you angry?"
Me" You bought a fucken without consulting me!"
"We are moving to another city and I'll be your trophy wife! I don't want that and you know it!!! You continue to make me feel like I am your personal prostitute"
Michael" Maybe I should go. Before we both say things we will end up regretting"
Me" See? I am telling you something that is bothering me and you just want to nip it in the bud like I didn't just tell you something that matters to me"
Michael" Things that matter to other people. Not you. Other people and I will not try to convince otherwise. This one is something you have to deal with by yourself"
Me" I just want you to understand why I feel like this!"
Michael" Balisa! You honestly think loving you doesn't come with any judgement from my side?. You think you are the only one who deals with the backlash? Because I do too. The only difference between us is that I trust our love enough to not listen to outside noise"
Me" You make me feel like you are buying my love"
" I checked the homes in Bedfordview and that's a lot of money, and a Porsche is not cheap. I just...."
Michael" Wait! You want me to apologize for having the means?, what exactly do you want?. For us to act poor then you'll feel less guilty? What is it that you want?"
Me" It's fine. Leave it"
Michael" I love you and I won't apologize for affording our lifestyle"
"You need to stop letting everyone make it seem like that's why you are with me. Unless they know something that I don't know. I can't and won't apologize for my wealth, I worked way too hard to be ashamed of it"

*

Michael And I left for PE the day after the fight, he dropped me off then disappeared for three days. Without a word, and when he returned I didn't say anything.
" Balisa"
I was watching t.v. with Gladys, I'm not quite sure what we were watching.
Me" Mama?"
Gladys" I try not to interfere in your marriage, phof oko ndanazi, there has never been a need for me to meddle"
Me" And now there is?"
Gladys" Sana lwam, never let your husband spend 3 nights outside of your home. Ever, ayiyo tuu. Don't give outsiders an opportunity"
Me" He was in a hotel"
Gladys" That doesn't matter, he wasn't in his house"
"Marriage is not easy, at least that's what everyone says but I think we make it difficult ngokwethu. Did you ask Michael why he slept in a hotel kodwa kukho 5 other unoccupied bedrooms in his house?"
Me" I trust Michael"
" Siyahamba Mama, he wants us to move to Johannesburg. He bought a house and we are just packing up"
Gladys" Niya kwi ntombi yakhe?"
I felt like an idiot the minute Gladys said this, I have been pushing Michael to fix things with Elena. She is there, it's impossible for him to actually achieve this if we are here.
Me" I honestly forgot about that"
" It's just that my sister said so much about my marriage and I haven't been able to forget the things she said"
Gladys" Yaz when I first saw you two, I thought what everyone else was thinking. Until I got to know you. Your sister may be your sister but she doesn't know you and Michael. Kodwa wena you do"
" Iyenzeka lanto in every relationship and marriage, you just have to remind yourself of what's important and the rest will follow"