ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS

1. WEDDING DAY

★ Leonard's Perspective ★

"Where the hell is she?"

My bride is ten minutes late. I am patiently waiting for her to arrive at the altar, and everyone is anxiously looking at me. I am feeling all their attention and smile back as if there is nothing wrong with the situation.

Our priest keeps looking at his wristwatch every few minutes. My mother, from where she is sitting, smiles at me while holding her hands up in the air as if she wants to say, "There is nothing we can do about it, can we?"

I take out a white handkerchief from my chest pocket and wipe my sweat from my forehead. Then I take a deep breath and start to think about something else to calm myself down.

This feels like a scene from a bad Hollywood film.

"Oh, boy! There she goes again!"

I reflect on my life with Beth, who is late to her own wedding.

I have always been waiting for her since I was little. Whenever we have decided to meet somewhere, I was still the one to arrive first. She ever casually showed up a while later with her warmest smile. I forgot about what happened, and everything was fine afterward. Nothing changed, even for our wedding day.

I thought this is how it would go today as well, a typical Beth's way.

When I start to get tense, my father quietly approaches the altar and whispers something in my ear.

"Leo, keep calm. On the way to the church, Beth was in an accident. We have to go to the hospital right away!"

I can't believe that he is making such a stupid joke right before our wedding. It was the worst joke he ever told me.

"That is such a bad joke! It isn't even funny, Dad!"

He comes closer to me and holds my shoulder. Then, he whispers in my ear again.

"We are leaving right now. Don't freak out! I will take you to the car."

This is all I remember, and my brain goes blank.

The next thing I remember is being in the hospital. I am sitting right next to Beth's mother, who is sobbing into my shoulder. We are sitting on the couch right outside of the emergency room where Beth was brought in.

Both of our families are there, expecting the surgeon to open the door and tell us not to worry, that Beth just had a minor injury. Some patients pass by staring at us wide-eyed, as all of us are still in dresses and tuxedos.

Two hours have already passed since Beth went into the emergency room. The tension is mounting every minute. I cannot think straight and keep staring at the door to the emergency room.

I feel as if I am having the worst nightmare and will wake up soon thinking, "That was a real nightmare!" and tell Beth about how horrible it was.

As I am trying so hard to wake myself up from this nightmare, the door at the emergency room opens. All our attention goes to the surgeon who appears. He has a very stern face that is a sign of fatigue from the long hours of this operation.

He calls Beth's mother and father to come into the room. Both of them anxiously follow him inside. A few minutes later, when the door shut behind them, we hear her mother's loud cry.

When I hear it, my heart sinks deep with fear. It is so apparent that something terrible has happened. All of us freeze with despair. The surgeon comes out again to let us know that Beth passed away, then he stops right in front of me and voices his condolence.

"I am very sorry to tell you that your bride-to-be passed away a few minutes ago."

The doctor holds his breath a moment.

"We tried our very best to save her, but the accident's injury was so grave that we weren't able to stop the internal hemorrhage fast enough to save her life."

"I am very sorry. If you would like, you may come in and pray or say goodbye to your bride. Fortunately, her face wasn't damaged at all. She is very peaceful. Please come!"

I don't want to believe what he just told me. I don't. My legs feel like heavy lead weights, and I follow the surgeon with great regrets.

When I enter the room, it is empty except for Beth on the surgery table, holding her hands in the union right over her chest. Her eyes are firmly closed, and she looks as if she is in a deep sleep.

I wish so hard that she has been orchestrating this drama to scare me. She will open up her eyes and tell me.

"Boop! Surprise! Gotcha!"

She'll laugh at me, and everything will continue as before. But she is lying still, and her death permeates the surgery room. Finally, I take her hand gently, pull the wedding ring from my pocket and place it on her finger.

When I gaze at her lovely face, her eyelids appear to move slightly. I blink and stare at her with disbelief. She opens her eyes to look at me, and her beautiful lips utter the words.

"Remember me."

"When I come back to you, please remember me."

"I love you always, always, always."

Then she closes her eyes eternally. I feel that her soul is gone forever. At that moment, I lose all my senses and start to sob so violently, still clutching her hand in mine.