Jegulus Beetlejuice AU

New Dead, New Chances

The arm chair that was facing the fire of the untamed room was occupied. Lighting up all the features ugly, fat, unusual, unappealing, and weird. Say his name three times and you'll get trouble. The black and white striped suit was making him, if you could even call it that, a dead inmate. Though I suppose he is already dead, had been for quite some time. You could tell by the rotting flesh, teeth, and bones that they had left his body for a long time. Probably dropping his corpse in a unmarked grace. The prison look doesn't look good on the rough and fleshy edges of his body, come to think of it nothing does. Not even a burlap sack could hide the sheer horror of his face. Looking down to where the green hair that probably hasn't been brushed since his original death in the 16th century stuck up all angles. The creature is in no way charming, though he, sorry it, tries to be. The creature tries to scam the life out of people, even when they have no life left to live. His cheap TV ads in the afterlife can't get him enough clients, some are smart enough to not feel pity for him. His gruff voice came from the body that was laying in the dirty, gross, cheap, and foul smelling chair. 

"Huh, Sandworm incidents increase by 13%. Interesting." 

Maybe he doesn't have anyone there for him because he was abandoned in his life. The years of loneliness brought him to take the comfort he needed from others. Maybe that's why his skin is so cold, or pockets so empty one minute but filled to the brim the next. The man still talks, the coning man still talks to himself because he cheated his way away from everyone else. 

"Well I better find a job, lets see, business, oh! Here's one." His greedy eyes looking down at the paper for someone else to rob he lands on a newly wed couple. Regulus Black, and James Potter. Not even dead 3 weeks ago. He was going after the fresh ones, easier to get what he want's. 

"Cute couple, look nice and stupid too." Of course he would think that. Just because they need help, he has a chance to get the easy ones.

I know this sounds like a harsh observation of him, maybe it is, maybe I'm biased. He was my assistant after all, but he stole from me. No one steals from me. It isn't like he deserves it. Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice. You're digging your own grave. I want to do it for you, but its more fun this way. 

Yes I know, short and bad, but like whatever.