[dreamnotfound] forever yours, George

three

let's skip ahead a little. january 18, 2010.

winter whipped our jeans and stung our cheeks, piling snow around our boots and trailing into the warmth of our homes.

we were better friends by now. we had even had a sleepover over winter break at my house.

i was embarrassed when you came over. i had cleaned and swept and hidden away all my personal belongings, because i was worried sick that you would laugh at me.

i hid away my Scream poster,
my frog statue,
my mints jar
and my cat's bed.

my veins shuddered in anxious adrenaline when i heard your knock on my door.

my mom immediately took a liking to you.

she gave you a warm smile and hung up your coat, and your charming words slipped through her ears and straight to her naive mind. i didn't care, to be honest.  i wanted you to myself.

so i led you upstairs and we sat on the floor of my room. you asked me if i played blackjack, and i said no.

so you taught me. Clay, you taught me a betting game. a game of wage and loss, and you taught me and we played and i won and i lost.

"i like your eyes. one is brown, one is blue." you whispered to me. my heart fluttered and flipped and dove into a warm ocean of numbness.

"yours are better." i told you.

"mine are puke. puke green."

"i like green."

"no, George, you like blue."

and you reached forward with a thin, long hand and brushed my eye shut, staring at me for a moment.

"what are you doing?"

"now, both your eyes are blue."

we both laughed at that.

dinner that night was steak and mashed potatoes, my favourite. i finished quick because i was hungry. stress makes my appetite disappear.

10 pm, lights went out. you and i both slept on the ground, heads nearly touching and hair mixing, looking up at the ceiling of my room and whispering to each other.

"we're gonna move mountains, George."

"you're a moron. that doesn't mean anything."

"mountains. that's huge."

"nuh uh. this friendship, this'll be bigger."

"okay."

"we are- we are friends, right?"

"of course. idiot."

and then you drifted off into a feathering sleep, the air around us mingled and inspired and exhausted.

the night lilted above us. do you remember that feeling? maybe you felt it in your sleep. the feeling of the night watching us, for just a moment, and all the stars saw us and sighed and looked away again.

we would move mountains.

yeah.

forever yours,
George