you can fly even higher

something right (tendou)

Tendou Satori

Tendou Satori was quietly looking at the letter he just wrote. He wasn't sure if it was a good idea to give it to you with some chocolates, he made himself, nor if you will still be his friend after you read the letter. He wasn't sure of anything at this rate and he was starting to regret everything in the first place.

Because is not the first time he writes a love letter to someone, is not the first time he puts his heart on paper to someone else to read it, is not the first time he makes chocolate for someone, is not the first time he has hope. But is the first time he will confess to someone he has always consider a friend, it is the first time he is scared of what can happen.

He can't use his super guessing ability to know if you will reject him or not, because you were a very quiet person that only smiled or laughed when he did one of his bad jokes or when he started acting like a fool. You were more like Ushijima in that sense, quiet, observant but also kind and smart.

His heart skips a beat when he thinks of Ushijima. What if he likes you too?

The captain never told him explicitly that he liked you, because Ushijima wasn't a person of too many words either way, but he sometimes looked at you with a weird look, a look Tendou knew pretty well.

You weren't too expressive with those things neither, but you were always talking to Ushijima since you were one of the club managers. And for some reason, you always had a smile on your face when he was close.

What if you like him?

What if you confess to him?

Tendou sighs sadly. He is not even sure of anything anymore and that scares him. For the first time in his life, he is the one who feels scared.

The bell makes him realize that he is still in his classroom and that everyone is getting out because is lunchtime. Tendou's belly twists when he realizes that this is the time where he is supposed to confess.

Swallowing hard and trying to pretend that he is not nervous at all, he takes the letter and the little box with the chocolates. His grip is tight because he is scared to lose them or something, but also because he is almost trembling with how nervous he is.

When he gets out of the classroom, he finds that people are all around the place and that the red and pink, and white decorations are making him feel even worse. He doesn't understand why he is so nervous. He has confessed before, he has been rejected before, so why the hell he was so nervous?

Well, maybe it had to with the fact that it was you who he was going to confess to. Like, you were one of his oldest friends, and falling in love with you could be a mistake on his part since, well, not all friends who grow up together are meant to be more than friends. That just happened in shoujo manga, so he wasn't pretty sure about his chances.

Until something or more like someone bumped him in the hallway.

"Oh, sorry. Let me he – Y/L/N-chan?", he suddenly stops, when he realizes that the person he bumped with was the person he was looking for.

"Oh, hi, Tendou-chan", you say, smiling brightly at him, making him grin too because he couldn't stop himself. You didn't smile nor grin often, but when you did, Tendou felt like everything was brighter. "Sorry for bumping you. I was looking for Ushijima-san".

And just as fast as Tendou's smile grew, it was gone. It took a sentence, a simple sentence to break - no, chatter – his heart into pieces. He swallowed, more than saliva, he swallowed his feelings, his jealously, and his anger. But then he told himself that he was expecting it. Everyone liked Ushijima more than him, he was better than him at everything either way.

"Oh", he says, looking at the chocolate box he has in his hand. Is not the one he made for you, is addressed to Ushijima. Tendou feels like he wants to cry. "He must be somewhere then", Tendou gives you the chocolate box and takes his in a hurry, without seeing that the letter he wrote is not in his hand. "I see you at practice then".

And without waiting for further words, he runs away from you even when you called him.

When he arrived at the boy's bathroom, his vision was blurry and he was grabbing his shirt, where his heart was, like it physically pained. He found a cubicle, he closed the door, and then, when he couldn't stop himself anymore, he let the tears go.

Why was he crying? He knew what was going to happen. Why he believed, for a moment that he had a chance with you?

Why someone like you will love someone like him in the first place? He was weak, pathetic, and a monster. Yeah, especially a monster.

Tendou is not sure how much time he spent crying in silence in that cubicle. He only knows that his eyes turned red as his hair, that his hair was messy thanks to how much he pulls it and runs his fingers through it and that his heart was broken again. He has lost count of how many times it has been broken, so maybe that's why it doesn't hurt that much after crying a while.

When he hears the bell that announces the end of the lunch, he decides that he is a little hungry but that has to return to class because crying in the bathroom isn't going to help him graduate.

Pretending that everything is okay, he gets out of the cubicle, washes his face a little, and then, with the little homemade box still in hand, he walks to his classroom again. Some people give him looks because he is a little bit of a mess, but looks and comments from people aren't something strange to him.

He continues to his classroom until he is about to open its door. He stops suddenly, because a voice that he knows pretty well, stops him.

For a few seconds, Tendou doesn't move, he doesn't look in your direction but neither opens the classroom door, to which he is getting late. He simply stays there, frozen in space until you arrive at his side, almost without breath thanks to the running you have been doing to get him.

"Tendou-kun, please wait", you say, trying to catch your breath. Tendou swallows again, forbidden himself from looking at you. "I just want to know if this letter is yours".

At the mention of a letter, Tendou turns his head around, just to find that you're holding the letter he wrote to you. His heart skips a beat and he opens his mouth and moves his free hand to take it from you, but he stops when you look at him.

For a second or two he swears he can see hope in your eyes.

"Do you mean it? Everything you wrote in here?"

"Yes, I do", he answers, in a voice that doesn't sound so much like his.

To his surprise you grin, you grin like never before and Tendou is breathless for a few seconds.

You make a move to reveal something behind you and then you extend it to him. Tendou looks down and finds a home-made box.

"I wanted to give Ushijima my Valentine's Day gift first because I wanted to tell you something more important. But my plan didn't work out and I fear you misunderstood everything".

Slowly, Tendou's hand reaches for the box. When he opens it, he finds brownies. Brownies he knows you did yourself. He wants to cry again, but for different reasons now.

"I like you too, Tendou-chan. And I'm sorry if you cried thinking differently", Tendou is already crying, when he looks at you again. He doesn't say anything, he simply hugs you back.

You felt the same. For him. Not for Ushijima, for him.

"Please, don't cry".

"Sorry, is just that...", Tendou never ends that sentence because he is too emotional to do it. In its place, he offers you the box of chocolates he did for you. You take them happily and hug him again.

And that's how, Tendou, feels like finally, something is right in his life.