Perfect Nightmare

Chapter 30

I had to blink a few more times just to get the words through to me. Ben has mental illness and Cecelia knew about it. She didn't bother telling me about this at all. How could she just do this to me?

I look up at her who is watching me with a close eye. "How dare you not tell me?" I say almost ready to get up and leave but then I stopped myself. I need to know everything. I need to know why she was being so mean and almost tried to kill me.

I have to stop pushing my problems away and face them.

"That's what I wanted to talk to you." she says. "I'm trying to protect you from Ben."

"Protect me!" I let out a harsh chuckle ad everyone around the café looks at us. "Last time I checked I was in the hospital because of you. Did you forget about that?" I try to calm myself down by breathing in and out.

"I didn't forget about any of that. I really sorry Cassie I was just-"

"Just what?" I cross my arms over my chest. This is probably the first time I have seen Cecelia out of words. She always had something to say but how come now she doesn't. All my life I had to deal with her being the boss of my life and not standing up for me. I have to stop this.

"I was jealous." Her words being me back to reality as I look at her with a raised eyebrow. "When your parents adopted me I was everything to them. They only talked about how much they would spend time with me and how much they loved me and nothing would throw that away. Then mom found out she was pregnant with you. Everything changed because all she talked about was how happy she was to have a baby." Why would she feel jealous about me? I was just a baby. "I was always there but i felt like I wasn't. One time I was at my play in first grade mom and dad forget about it and forget me there because they were with you at the baby store."

"I didn't know about that." I say shaking my head.

"They didn't ether because I didn't say anything one of my friend's mom dropped me off. Don't you get it Cassie everyone loves you and cares about you more than you think? You just don't want that because you're scared."

"Then why did you try to kill me." I ask her as her head drops not being able to look at me. The waitress walks over t our table handing me over my latte. I thank her before she leaves and turn back to Cecelia. Here hair was curled in big waves and her brown eyes popped out from the little sun coming through the window.

"I was angry at how everyone loved you more so I put the pills in your room that day when you were sick but when I left I just had to go back to your room and take them back. I felt too guilty knowing that I didn't stop you from taking those pills. When I found out you were in the hospital I left. I didn't even look back I just left. I didn't think about college or anybody else but the only thing was that I needed to leave."

"I don't know what to say?" I really don't.

"Don't say anything. I'm here to talk to you about Ben."

"Okay." Was the only thing I said?

"I found out that Ben would take pills to stop his illness but when she started dating you that's when she stopped taking them every day and only one ad week which is bad because he would go crazy." She starts off. "He also stopped going to his therapist after junior year."

"After I left I started to get really subspecies of Ben so I followed him around trying to see what his problem was. Once I did I wanted to tell you but I didn't know if I was sure to even come back. Then I got into this university as I came to England."

"There is another thing you need to know." Cecelia says. "Someone is helping Ben."

"What do you mean by someone is helping me how?" I ask her after drinking some of my latte and running a hand through my hair. My hand gets tangled at the bottom of my hair. I really need to get a haircut and do something to it.