HAIKYUU!! // one shots

23

⌲ ❝ hold me ❞
『ushijima wakatoshi × oikawa tooru』

⸙.

『もし彼が幸せになることを意味するなら、あなたはあなたの幸せを犠牲にしても構わないと思いますか？』

"What?"

Oikawa gulped. Iwaizumi's eyes were the scariest things that he has ever seen. When he stared at him, he felt like it was piercing right through his gut- he can feel his throat becoming dry and his lips trembling. He couldn't utter a word- or at least, he doesn't want to. For it could only confirm the painful truth for him, and he doesn't want to wake up yet.

"I don't remember receiving a message from you that you'll visit." Iwaizumi stated, hands on the doorknob, as he stares at Oikawa from head to toe. "What is it?"

"I-Iwa-chan," Oikawa lets out a burst of breathy laughter before holding the edge of Iwaizumi's door. "Can we talk?"

"No-"

"I promise it won't take long!" Oikawa blurted out, but when he felt the other's eyes burning into him, he avoided his gaze. "...I promise."

"There is nothing else to talk about, Oikawa." Iwaizumi's voice was firm as he slaps Oikawa's hand away from his door. "We're already done."

"B-but-!"

"But what? Just leave me alone and don't bother me again."

Oikawa never felt so pathetic before. If his fangirls would see him right now, he bet they'll all laugh at the image of him begging in front of his ex-boyfriend's house every day. But he doesn't want to stop either- he would never accept the fact that Iwaizumi doesn't love him anymore.

It was too sudden. The memories of them laughing together sounds so clear in his head that he could remember everything - the way Iwaizumi's cheeks flushes in beet red whenever Oikawa teases him, the way his hand wraps around Oikawa's like a gift, and the way he tries to suppress his laughter whenever Oikawa tried to do something stupid - Oikawa could remember it all, as if it was yesterday.

"I said okay when you told me about it because I wanted to give you space," Oikawa told him. "I didn't know that 'give me space' actually meant breaking up. Because if that was the case, I would never let you go away from me, Iwa-ch-"

"I really, really, really do not love you anymore, Oikawa." Iwaizumi's voice sounded like an alarm for Oikawa for him to wake up. There wasn't a hesitation in his voice, as if they didn't spend more than two decades stuck with each other.

Iwaizumi doesn't love Oikawa anymore, and that f*cking hurts like a dagger on his throat.

"That's stupid!" Oikawa replied, tears starting to form in the corner of his eyes. "Love isn't something that just expires suddenly!"

"But it happened." Iwaizumi said, resolute. "It happened, Oikawa. You know that I am not the type of person who would lie."

"B-but..." ...how about me?

Oikawa felt something heavy inside him- he couldn't take a step away from Iwaizumi's house. Lips pursed inwards, eyes staring straight at the man in front of him. Should he reach out more? Ask once more? Beg for him to come back? Tell him how horrible his life would be without him? Maybe Iwaizumi would change his mind?

No, Oikawa thought. It wasn't as dramatic as the movies suggest. There wasn't any rain to hide his tears from falling, nor a prince charming that could save his face from humiliation. It was a peaceful night- the wide road almost empty with a car or two passing by every ten minutes, the yellowish street light flickering on and off, and the distant sounds of the neighbor's dog barking outside.