{One Shots} killua x reader

Am I just a toy to you?

READ: Killua is a tundsere brat in this, if you dont know what tundsere means it just means a person who is cold to other people even if they like them. Tundsere people have a hard time expressing their feelings so that is why they are so cold.

TW: cussing 

Y/n Pov

You were at your shared apartment with killua. You were laying on your shared bed watching him play games with his friends. For the past month he has been so distant. You were tired of always chasing after him and his attention. He would never say he loved you, He didn't even show that he cared for you with his actions. You were getting sick of it. You just wanted to feel the comfort most boyfriends give their girlfriend. You never told Killua this because you didn't want him to doubt your love for him. You honestly felt like a toy to him. Every time he would communicate with you it would just be him asking for food or anything he needs, but never asking for cuddles or any love. You knew he was a tundsere but it still hurt you. You wished you didn't care all the time, but you did care when he wouldn't even say goodbye to you when he left for work. It hurts when he only gives attention to his games. You're an over-thinker so your mind would fill your thoughts with things like he didn't love you or he lost his love for you. You would try to ignore these thoughts but it just keeps getting harder each day. Today you had it, you finally were going to tell killua your thoughts.

¨Killua I want to talk to you¨ You said sitting on the edge of the bed hoping he would just listen

¨ I'm playing games right now we can talk later¨ He said not sparing you a glance. You were sick of how he would treat you so you would not take no for an answer.

¨ I don't want to play any games . I'm tired of always chasing after you and your attention. You never let me play games with you or even communicate with you. Every time I try to talk to you, you're playing video games. I guess i'm just a toy to you¨ you said letting all your feelings out, you noticed you started yelling at him which you've never done, it felt good though.

¨Who do you think your talking to, yelling at me sense when.¨ He asked finally looking at you

¨Ever sense you stopped giving a fuck about me¨ You yelled once again

¨I don't give a fuck about you anyways, who ever said I gave a shit about you in the first place¨ he said with a tone as if this whole relationship was a joke. You were speechless at his words

¨ I guess I really am just a toy to you..... You know killua all I have tried to do was give you what you needed, All I've done is love you and this is how you repay me! I fucking hate you¨ You yelled, you felt tears begin to prick your eyes, You were done with this conversation. You walked out of the room so you could clear your thoughts.

Killua POV

¨ I hate you¨ hearing those words made my heart hurt. Hearing those words coming from the person I love most hurts so fucking bad. She probably doesn't even think I love her, but little does she know she is the only reason I'm here. Why can't I just love her and tell her how beautiful she is. I want to tell her but my mouth doesn't let me. Why the hell did I have to say that I don't give a fuck about her when shes the only thing I love. She probably does hate me and a lot at that. She has every right to. I don't want her to leave, I need to say sorry. I need to at least say sorry even if those are my last words to her.

I walked down stairs to see her listening to music that I could hear through the headphones. I frown seeing her state. Her eyes are all red and she is trying to give herself warmth by hugging herself.

¨Hey y/n, can we talk about what I said earlier¨ I said hoping she would listen

Y/n Pov

You were sitting there music feeling your ears. You didn't even notice killua's presence, nor did you hear him. You were just letting the music feel your ears while your thoughts were all negative. You jumped feeling someone take out your headphones from your ears causing the music to stop.

¨Hey y/n, can we talk about what I said earlier?¨ You heard killua say, you could tell by his voice something was off but you didn't care. You didn't even want to look at him, but you pushed that aside and let your thoughts come into words. Hurtful ones.

¨Let me see if I can remember what you said, oh yeah. I dont give a fuck about you anyways, who ever said i give a shit about you, who ever said I gave a fuck about you in the first place¨ You repeated  his words in a harsh tone. You could see his eyes widening at your response but he quickly closed his eyes realizing he deserved it. You didn't care if it hurt him, you just kept going.

¨Killua I'm just a toy for you when you need someone to pity you. I always give you love but when it comes to me you never give a shit, I JUST WANT TO GIVE YOU WHAT YOU NEED¨ you said but got interrupted by killuas finger press against your mouth.

¨ Shh, You know I give a fuck about you everyday, I guess its time I tell you the truth, I love you y/n, your the only reason I wake up every day, I get to see your face every morning and I love it. I'm sorry I don't show it but you're the only thing I love.¨ he said with a calming tone. You could tell he meant it. He seemed so relieved telling you how he really felt. You were about to speak but his lips crashed into yours not allowing you to say a word, you kissed back it felt good kissing him again. You missed him and his lips. You could tell this is going to happen more often now. That brought a smile to your face.