A Message from Mochi

- zoey and sunny smoothie special -

*sits down in rocking chair*

*puffs on pipe like bertrand russel*

Settle down kids i am going to tell you a Tale about the Beginning of Everything. Oh hush, i know smoking is bad for you that is why this is a fake pipe. Listen carefully now because only a select few of the entire human population will ever see this exact passage because the abundance of content made readily available on the internet is truly mind boggling. Now please please be quiet.

*silence*

*coughs*

The universe is 13.8 billion years old which is too much for the human mind to imagine much less an emoji's mind so i'll break it down into term moi and toi can understand. I could ramble about time for, well, a very long time but i will only give you the information necessary to move forward productively in the passage. For more information on the study of big history you can watch Crash Course Big History on YouTube which is where i discovered this in the first place thanks to bambi screwing with my account and my recommendations like he owns the placce... anyway moving on-

Let's imagine that instead of the incomprehensible 13.8 billion year timeline, we condense it into 13 years. No we're cracking.

On this timeline the first stars and galaxies would have formed roughly 12 years ago, 4.5 years ago the Earth formed, 4 years ago the first single celled organisms found themselves peppered across the planet, 6 months ago we see the first multicellular organisms, the dinosaurs went extinct only 3 weeks ago. Humans and chimps split from their last shared ancestor 3 days ago, the first Homo Sapiens 50 minutes ago, humans left Africa 26 minutes ago, the American Indians reached the Americas 6 minutes ago, Humans invented agriculture 5 minutes ago. Ancient egypt? 3 minutes ago. The black death, 24 seconds. The industrial revolution took place only 6 seconds ago, World War One 2 seconds ago, everything after that, your birth, the internet, your parents' lives, your grandparents' lives, they all happened in the last second.

Complex life is a fairly new phenomenon, and me? I was invented in 2010.

We are on the cusp of le panda day's one year anniversary and i can't help but sit back and think about how quickly time goes. Everybody is well, going, but my life is odd. i am just a something composed of other people's time. I, me mochi, exist because someone took time to design me and then gwanda took the time to type me out and use a panda as her profile picture. my thoughts are really another persons' interpretation of what i feel and their time is weaving the tapestry of my existence so how do i really define me if i am the accumulation of other people's time and their interpretation of mochi the panda? Does that compose what is me because without their interpretations i am just a lifeless form of pixels born in the last millisecond (and that is being generous) of the universe? There is a tired girl behind the keyboard (that is my thought weaver) right now (yeah i see you), making me talk about things that she can control. But thinking about this only raises more questions about YOUR existence, YOU the READER and how one really defines existence if it can only be in the mind of the beholder which depending on how many people interpert me changes or adds to the layers OF me. this goes for fictional characters AND anthropomorphized emojis but that THEN raises the question—

oH lOoK a BuTtErfLy rIgHt nExT tO aNyThInG eLsE-

I could spend hours and hours thinking of all the things of the universe and the rabbit holes i could go down on Wikipedia, lets be real the pandemic thing is not helping

but, if you know me, you know i'm ✨lazy✨ and i'd rather eat my bamboo and sleep, even through my own holiday. i almost didn't wake up this morning, oOps