Secret | (Merder)

I Thought We Were Good?!

Derek's P.O.V

When eating dinner Mer was spacing in and out. She would stare blankly at her plate and then jolt. Mer would then stuff some mashed potatoes in her mouth. This take out was really good. I got it at a new restaurant, it seems Mer likes it. Something is just bugging her. I known Mer for a while and when she gets antsy she wants and needs to do something.

Mer just blurted, "I got to go." I whip my head up and put on a concerned face.

"You're still in recovery, you can't drive yet-" Mer then nodded. I knew where she wanted to go. There was three options for what she wanted to do. Tequila, dancing it out, or complaining about life. Option 1 and 3 were good contenders, but I'm not so sure about option 2. Anyways we continued to eat in complete silence. It was what Mer wanted, I wanted. It was just what we needed. We were both still in shock and... well just complete shock about the last couple of weeks.

It has been a crappy couple of months, you know... the shooting thing, the baby thing. As Cristina would say, that's a lot of things.
During our silent dinner I am just sitting there with my thoughts. Thinking about potential dessert, how early do I have to get up for my next shift so I have time to do my hair... just thoughts that crossed through my mind at the time. After I saw both of our plates empty, I grabbed them to finish washing dishes.

***

"Goodnight Derek."

I laid a kiss on Mer's cheek, "Goodnight Mer"

I tossed and turned a bit before drifting off to sleep with dreamless dreams.

I heard some noises and woke up out of a deep sleep. My alarm clock gleamed through the room reading, '2:04'. My hand extended to reach for Mer, but she wasn't there at all.

"Mer? Mer? Meredith!?" I walked through the whole house. I saw that her favorite sneakers and car keys were gone.

"Oh Mer, what did you do..." I quickly put on some sweats and sneakers, grabbed my car keys and went to the only place I knew she would go. Cristina's. I started the car and darted out of the driveway. I made sure to look very carefully for any cars that looked like Mer's.

***

My headlights gleamed through the driveway of Cristina's place. I hopped out of my car to knock on her door, before I got the chance to knock Meredith answered.

"Hi... Derek"

"Meredith... you could've been hurt! You just got out of the hospital, I don't want you to go back. I can't go through that again-"

"You... go through- that? Derek you didn't suffer! I did! I DID! Not you, NOT YOU DEREK!" Cristina was holding Mer back.

"Meredith- You didn't tell me about this baby! I had one day to react to you in a hospital, and losing our BABY!"

Meredith just gasped and Cristina started talking, "Meredith cool down it was hard for everyone, ok? Although you went through tough stuff so did the rest of us. I'm on nobodies side here. Just stop arguing okay?"

Meredith sighed, "Alright... I'm staying here Derek go to your perfect home" Meredith started walking in Cristina's home.

"Meredith wait!" Meredith stepped back. "I thought we were good..."

Meredith blankly stared, "Well we aren't still... I'm still hurt from you."

I was puzzled, "W-What did I do?" Meredith made her way back inside completely. Cristina sighed, "sorry Derek..." and the she closed the door. I walked away back to my car. I was so mad, Meredith is not the only one who went through something during the shooting. I got shot! I am just pissed. I tried started my car, but it didn't start...