Present Day
You stood in the middle of the cold white room as a single tear fell down your cheek. You felt hopeless a vulnerable to be here again, and nothing could help you. You looked down to see Hotch holding your frail body in his hands as you went unconscious again.
"What are you doing back here I thought you decided?" Mikayla asked, her voice was echoing but you couldn't see her body it was just an endless tunnel of nothingness.
"I- needed to talk to you again" you cried, placing your hand over your mouth to silence the pain.
"But you choose to live." she wasn't mad but in a way just disappointed at you for coming back.
"Now I don't want to okay? I want to be with you away from mom— away from the team, just away" your body ached not in physical pain but mental like a demon took you over. A guilt racked inside of you for leaving everyone but you couldn't bare to live without her.
"What about Spencer y/n?!"
"Mikayla we wouldn't work you don't understand!" you raised your voice yelling at simply nothing but the sound of her echoing through the walls.
A laugh admitted from her, "Would you like to see what it would've been like?" she asked.
You stood frozen unable to comprehend what she was saying. Part of you wanted to look at would could've been but what if you regret your decision to stay? Or what if Spencer does love you and you threw it away because your selfish. To many what if's ran through your mind as you tried to figure out what to do.
"But- how could you do that" you stuttered out.
"Y/n all I have to do is show you" her body suddenly appeared behind yours. Yet this time she didn't look sick or sad she looked at peace. She wore a long white beach dress that reached her bare feet.
"What if I regret my decision?" you asked curious on what would be the future of you looking down upon what could have been.
"Please let me show you" Mikayla pleaded taking your hands in hers. Her soft hands with white nail polish dressing them up.
"I don't know yet ,let's talk first" you decided.
"Okay" she breathed with a smile pulling you over to a bench that had appeared. The moment you sat the scenery turned into a endless field of flowers, daisies to be exact.
You wanted to ask her how Spencer felt about you, and why she wanted you to see the future so bad. Was something there that she wished you stayed for? Maybe, but you can't go back now and a sickening part of you was glad to never face your parents again for what they did. "What's your question?" she asked snapping you out of your thoughts. Staring into her huge glistening eyes you tried to find the words.
"Did he love me?" you questioned more tears threading to fall down.
"Of course he did y/n, he was to scared to tell you" she informed you.
More guilt racked in your body. You wouldn't be able to tell him that you loved him. That you would love him for infinity, if that even existed. "Did he know I loved him?" you cried resting your head in her shoulder.
"No..."she trailed off quietly.
Your cries turned into sobs at the fact you would never see him again. Never tell him that you loved him so much. How could you just leave him like that? And just before you left him you were yelling at him. Would he be able to tell that you loved him? Or would he forget about you.
"I think I want to see what could've been" you hesitated.
"Okay." she whispered.
Suddenly you were placed at the grocery store with mint chip ice cream in hand and seaweed snacks.
Than you cut your finger, you couldn't feel it because you aren't alive.
Of course the beach where he would've proposed.
Rossi's house showing everyone the ring and talking Esme.
The house, god the house. And falling asleep on his chest listening to his heart beat. Dancing with him and feeling safe.
-
Team Pov"Y/n!" Hotch screamed staring at your limp body. Your pulse was gone and no one cared to help her. You are gone.
"Please help anyone!" he screamed for the paramedics. A group ran over pulling your body onto a gurney. Hotch stared at them placing an oxygen over your mouth.
He rushed over to the car seeing Spencer trying to get out, a confused look on his face seeing your body gone from the car. "Where is she?" Spencer asked frantically to Hotch.
"Reid do not move" was all he said not daring to tell him just yet. "Aaron-" Spencer yelled demanding an answer.
"She is with in an ambulance she wasn't breathing" his voice cracked.
"What-" Reid's eyes filled with tears as he looked at Hotch.
"But they may be able to save her so let's not jump to conclusions" he comforted trying to lighten the mood.
-The team rode in two different cars to the hospital.
All Spencer would think about is how he never got to say he loved you. Why did he have to be so rude to you he thought to himself.
Soon enough the team pulled into the ER. Everyone jumped up and running into the entrance, silencing begging for a good update.
"I'm sorry ma'am but we don't have anything just yet she is in surgery" the nurse told Emily who was frantic. "Yeah okay thanks" she choked out making her way to the waiting room.
Emily wished that today was not the day she would be loosing her best friend to an accident.
The team all took seats around the room, tensions as thick, so thick you couldn't cut it with a knife.
Spencers leg bounced up and down anxiously waiting for an update in the love of his life. He had to admit that your relationship was kicking and quick but he knew for sure that he loved you.
Morgan couldn't stop thinking ether. How he was going to tell Garcia and what the office would be like without you.
JJ thinking about how girls nights would be so much more boring without the life of the party there.
And Rossi was thinking about missing you at his dinner parties, drinking wine and having the most deep conversations with him.
What seemed like says was only hours that they all waited around for something, anything really on your status.
Sounds of someone walking into the waiting room filled Spencers ears, "Y/n Y/l/n?" a nurse announced. No one else was in the waiting room.
"Yeah?" Emily shot yo from her seat along with everyone else.
"We did everything we could but he body went through to much, i'm so sorry but we lost her."
-
A/n-
One more chapter purrrr
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Only Mine | S.R. ✔️
FanfictionY/n is brand new to the BAU. She is a genius who always gave Dr. Spencer Reid a run for his money. Although her life she carries her family's burden. Will she get caught up in Spencer or will he find out about her dark secret. But happy endings are...