FAN ACCOUNT | yungi

𝐓𝐄𝐀 | 7

You broke him, you fix him. Don't expect him to pick up the broken pieces you caused and for him to return to normal. It takes time and pain. A lot of pain.

- Song Mingi, conversation with Kim Hongjoong

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"I'm so fucking stupid."

"That's the first fact I've heard you say in years."

Mingi glared unamused at Hongjoong, the latter adamantly ignoring the hot gaze coming from the rapper and focusing on the computer in front of him. The song they were working on captured the older's attention immediately, and Mingi sighed at his toxic love for working. A relationship bound to chaos, Mingi mused.

"It's too early to deal with your smartass mouth," Mingi grumbled, slouched on his chair and fumbling the pen with his fingers distractedly. Exactly how he had told Yun, the unfinished lyrics haunted his vision, and no matter how hard he thought, no ideas swarmed his mind like they usually did. He had had some, but Hongjoong's words were: "This is trash in its most powerful form." And Mingi couldn't help but agree. They were trash.

"You say that as if you don't deal with it daily," Hongjoong retorted. Apparently his attention wasn't as focused on the song as Mingi initially thought. The rapper didn't know if he should take it as a blessing or a curse. "So deal with it."

"Let me drown in my stupidity in peace, please," Mingi mumbled. He didn't dare look up. He could already feel Hongjoong's questioning gaze trying to analyze him and his depressed behavior, something that, when Mingi met eyes, he'd immediately fall victim to his hyung's inquiries. Unfortunately the reason behind his current mood was not something he could disclose. How would he explain to the second most paranoid person, coming after Seonghwa himself, that he'd just given his phone number to someone he's been talking to on Twitter? From a freaking fan account? His imagination already mustered some extremely possible scenarios, and in none of them he ended up alive.

Hongjoong, however, took no notice of Mingi's discomfort. Instead he kept staring. And staring. And staring. "Who pissed in your cereal this morning?"

Mingi suppressed the urge to chuckle. Yun had asked him the exact same thing.

"Seonghwa."

Mingi, of course, said it as a joke. No ill intention hid behind his response. But still, he couldn't help but notice how Hongjoong's teasing grin darkened considerably, his eyes pensive and unfocused. But as fast as it came, it disappeared, and instead he masked his sudden emotional flash with carelessness. It's something that sparked an inner curiosity in the younger, since Hongjoong was quite notorious for his lack of visible emotion, but he decided to keep quiet. For now, anyway. No way in hell was he letting this slip.

"Are you sure it isn't the other way around?" Hongjoong questioned, returning to his work.

"Ouch." Mingi clutched his heart. "New insecurity unlocked. Thanks, hyung."

The producer waved his dramaticness off, rolling his eyes, but a soft grin brightened his features. It made Mingi smile as well; he felt accomplished for making him smile like that, having sensed a cloud of trouble storming its way closer to his hyung. The sight reminded him of something he witnessed earlier, when he was on his way to the studio to finish the love song Hongjoong was so damn fixed on doing.

A love song, out of all things. It's way out of his area of expertise. Like he'd told Yun, he had absolutely no experience with love, never had the slightest contact with the emotion. Sure, before he realized he was gay, he dated a few girls, all of which were beautiful and extremely nice. Yet no matter how much he tried, no matter how much he convinced himself, he couldn't bring himself to say the words. I love you. So simple but so freaking hard. Why did Hongjoong even want to make a love song? It was such a random request; he should've said no. But Hongjoong's excitement at making it made him bite back his hesitance, and now here he was, stressed and tired and lonely.