I Need You to Stay

Chapter 21

I stared out the window looking at the snowflakes falling from the cloudy sky. The ground was soon covered in a light sprinkle of snow. I heard soft knock on my door watching mom open my door and close it behind her quietly. I went back to looking out the window. My head resting in my arms with my legs up on the chair.

"Are you okay?" Mom knelt down beside me brushing my hair away from my face.

I nodded feeling her gentle hand stroking my cheek

"You don't have to come to the shop today if you don't want to" Mom whispered 

"No, I will. I need to keep busy." I said 

"Okay sweetie, come in whenever you want. I love you" Mom kissed my forehead and left my room

I sat there for another hour, smelling Gerard's T-shirt that I was wearing. I felt like I was in a cycle of depression. If I wasn't crying then I was just feeling numb. I unlocked my phone and played a video of Gerard chugging down 2 litre bottle of Coke that we dared he wouldn't be able to do into in 2 minutes. In the end Gerard choked spilled Coke over everyone, making everyone sticky and wet. I smiled to myself when I noticed in the background Ray and Mikey were feeling each other up while Frank was shouting at Gerard. For those couple of minutes I felt happy but it didn't last.

I dragged myself up from the chair and got dressed. I slowly walked to the shop feeling that gravity was pulling me closer and closer to the ground. I need something to spark me up even if it was only for a couple of hours. I needed coffee. I walked into the Starbucks smelling the delicious scent. 

"Caramel Machiatto please" I smiled weakly at the energetic girl. I looked over and saw they were selling the blueberry muffins mom is obsessed with. "Can I have a blueberry muffin as well" I leaned over the counter to get the girl's attention.

I walked out of Starbucks content and warm as I held my caramel machiatto in both hands. I walked carefully feeling the crisp white snow crunch under my feet. The air was fresh and cold it hurt my throat as I breathed in the air.

I walked to the shop and looked in the window to see Malcolm at the cash register, totally forgetting that it was Saturday today and he's working here permanently.

"Shit" I whispered to myself as I closed the door behind me.

I walked past him, both of us taking no notice of each other's presence. Mom was in the back opening a box of stock which looked like more paint. 

"Hi honey" Mom smiled looking up from the box

"Hi, I got you something" I took out the blueberry muffin and threw it to her.

She looked at the wrapper, confused at first. 

"Thank you so much! I thought they didn't sell them anymore" Mom grinned setting it down beside the kettle

"Me either" I shrugged off my coat and hung it up.

"Fuck sake" Mom frowned at the box of paint

"What?" I looked down at her in shock because of the cursing that she rarely does.

"The paint company gave us the wrong paint again. This is the third time they have done this" Mom groaned

"It's not big deal just ring them up" I suggested drinking the last of my coffee

"I know, but it's so hard to get a hold of someone there. They keep you on hold forever" Mom took out her phone and dialed the number that was on the signed sheet and exited the shop to get better reception.

"Hey" I turned around to see the douche bag in the door way smirking like an idiot

"What you want?" I asked not being in the mood for his assholeness

"Just want a conversation. How was your holi-"

"Fine" I cut him off

"How's your boyfrien-"

"Good" I said studying the box of paint 

"Okay then" He sighed and went back to the cash register

The day was awkward and quiet. The only conversation that was going was when mom was talking to either of us. Malcolm went home early as the shop wasn't busy. 

I stocked up the paint brushes absentmindedly humming to myself.

"Malcolm is cute, isn't he?" Mom came up behind me fixing colouring books on the opposite shelf

"Not really, why? Gonna ask him out?" I scoffed 

"What? God no. What about you?"

"Mom I have a boyfriend, remember? Gerard? The ass guy" I smiled thinking about him

"I know but .... It's just.. Gerard is a lovely person and everything but he's away for so long an-"

"I love him mom" I interrupted her

"It's just hard on your relationship and I think you deserve someone who's more .... there, you know?" Mom explained

"Our relationship is fine mom. Actually it's better than fine."

"It's only a idea honey" Mom turned around and smiled at me. "I just want what's best for you" She caressed my shoulder and walked away, leaving me there to think things through.....

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I wonder what Lisa is thinking now! Maybe she'll get close to Malcolm , maybe she won't! WHO KNNOWS!! Anyway I think I'm going insane from exhaustion! Bye guys! Love reading you're amazing comments! Keeping bringing them! <3