A/n: My best friend loves with Ramsey the bull so this is her drawing. Hope you like it.
TW: infuriating suicide ⚠️
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We made it back to the pice of land we had lived on our whole lives. I noticed my house was untouched. The roses weren't broken, the gardens where how I left them. I frowned and walked up looking at the rocking chairs that where still in place.
I walked in and everything was perfect; given the few things I took.
Leslie came up behind me with the same confused face.
"But. Everything else was burned. The town was burned. Our houses where ransacked."
"I know."
"You should get some rest."
"Yeah. Rest."
I said, she kissed the side of my head and closed the door behind her. Just then the door opened again.
"Here's the desk."
Pa said,
"Just sit it right there."
I said and pointed to the corner. I examined the room.
"You'll be ok. Right?"
"Yeah."
"Holler if you need something."
"Ok."
He walked out and I was alone again.
But I was ok with that. I went to my room and lifted my mattress. It was a clean journal that James got for me. I trailed my hand over the leather cover and walked back over to the desk. It was ruffly six o'clock.
The past few months I couldn't bare to write in it until today.
July 23, 1836
~
This was where I started. I wrote in the last page
'The light has gone out of my life'
I put the pen down and looked at the full journal. Who knew what time it was now. I opened the
drawer and placed everything back in.
I held the book in my hand and looked at it.
Then after a few long moments I lowered it down and gently let it go. I closed the drawer and stood up stretching.
I was happy I could go back and read these memories and not have to worry about forgetting them.
I opened one letter and reread it.
'And lastly, my darling, in case I should be killed
Don't grieve me too long, promise me that you will
Marry another, don't let him treat our baby mean
When he's holding you, would you think of me too, Josephine?'
I had no reason to live other than the good Lord keeping me here. I wish I wasn't walking this Earth but I did long to walk on the clouds of Heaven to see me husband and my baby.
But This book was now my closest thing to James for now.
Until death sweeps me in its sweet grasp and the good Lord takes me into Heavens gates.
Death was close: even if I have to do it with my own hands.
YOU ARE READING
My Story (Complete)
RomanceMy name is Josephine Williams and this is My Story. A story full of love, loss, war, pain, and living. This is not one of those 'And she lived happily ever after' endings though I wish it was. It's about how I lived and I wish I didn't; after all of...
