Angel Eyed (DISCONTINUED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE)

DISCONTINUED (until further notice)

Hello there. It's me, Chantal, the writer of this story.

I have been gone for an unimaginable amount of time (4 months to be exact) both trying and failing to go back on a writing schedule and live what's left of life during quarantine at the same time. Even though things were horrible everywhere with all the deaths and the rising cases, I figured Quarantine last 2020 would be okay for me, because I would have more time to write, and that's just what I wanted. To be alone, without school in my mind. For a while it worked out. I didn't have school, I didn't have anything, all there was to do is dedicate myself into my stories, and maybe even finish them before the end of the year with the schedule I had planned in mind.

Nonetheless, despite all the anxiety and self-doubt and effort, I didn't write enough as much as I thought I would, or at all. So far, this has been the longest that I didn't write/update any of my stories, which genuinely scares me, because back then it would only take one to two weeks before I can go back to it. And even that was already too long for me and for you guys. I never wanted to leave you hanging even when you say it's alright and I can take my time. (Which is amazing, Thank you so much for being patient and waiting, and still supporting me despite my inconsistencies) I want you guys to have as much new content as I can give you, but unfortunately, that's just not what happened. I kept on promising to update and to go back on a steady schedule, yet, I kept on breaking every single one of them.

So yes, you read that right. I am discontinuing Angel Eyed UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE. I'm putting emphasis on the subtext because I have no idea when I'll pick it up again. At the moment I only have two chapters pending on this story, none of which push the narrative to completion because we stopped at a non crucial part of Cassandra just realizing sometimes book characters are more fleshed out, and have more emotions/purpose than actual people. And I don't know when I'll continue. ALTHOUGH I am certain I'll continue writing it somehow some time in the future. Because if it's not obvious enough by how much dedication I had for this story even though people didn't give it as much attention as my smut books, I lovveee lovve love Angel Eyed's plot and characters.

If you've read through any of the Q&A's I posted in my update book back then, you'd know the story behind Cassandra. I named her after one of my old, close internet friends, I even dedicated her the first few chapters. I also discussed the plot with my old bestfriend in the school library two years before quarantine, and she had the same enthusiasm I had for the plot, to the point where she filled in the holes I still had in the outline. You can see I wrote her a cameo somewhere in the story (I'll let you figure that one out lol)

But yes! I absolutely I adore the way I wrote Cassandra, Stella, and Bill and Harry, and I can never forget Angel. And it was interesting to see that even though I based the main character on a completely different person, parts of myself spilled into her traits. I'm also proud of the way I built Cassandra and Bill's relationship to be platonic but slightly romantic at the same time, just enough where you're questioning it yourself. And their emotions with each other, and their plans together. Stella was also quite a unique character for me to write. I wanted her to be sarcastic and interesting all at once, which I don't know if I was able to do because I'm neither, still I had sooo much fun with her dialogues and exchanges with Cass. It felt like I could just say whatever the fuck I wanted and it would still go along with the story just perfectly.

Of course it's automatic that I liked writing Harry even though there wasn't much of him in the story, which other people have pointed out. And yes, you guys are right, there's not enough Harry content in this despite the fact there was "h.s au." in the title, so I removed that to not confuse anyone anymore lmao. It still is an alternate universe fanfic, but I feel like it was never really just an h.s au. He wasn't even really himself in this. He's never himself in any of my stories because I just like using him as a vessel, and then build an entirely different person. It was more like; Harry is there and he's one of the most important characters in the story. The focus is on the plot. Not the characters.

I genuinely still want to finish this story, I just have no idea when that's going to happen, so I'm discontinuing it for a while, in that way I can lift off the pressure from myself, and you guys can have a clarification as well, as opposed to just having no idea. Because you deserve an explanation, especially after all this time. I'll still write it every now and then in my docs, like the way I do with all of my stories, but I'm not going to publish any of it until I'm final and certain that I have a concrete schedule. That, I'm also skeptical of.

I didn't go into detail as to why I'm discontinuing it, but for a little bit of context, I have just been feeling so unmotivated to do anything. I can't blame depression for it forever, because other people are sick too and they can still make and finish beautiful things. Nothing is stopping me from doing the same. Just me. I'm at a point in my life right now where I'm doubting everything I'm doing, when it's the most crucial part. I'm 19 now. I started this story when I was 16 so I have grown with it. This is the time when I should be building the foundations of my future, yet, I haven't done anything meaningful and important to me in the past year or so. I'm still trying to find myself. I'm trying to figure out what I want to do, and which people will be there for me at my lowest points, which hasn't been so easy.  And in the process, I have completely took writing for granted. And I hate myself for it.

I'm sorry to all of you who wanted to see more chapters of Angel Eyed and how it was going to end. It breaks my heart more than you guys know. This story is really special to me, and it took two months before I can finally decide to discontinue it, because I didn't want to. But I realized it would be better this way for now. I even planned on spilling the entirety of the plot already, but I didn't want to give it away until there is no hope anymore.

With that being said; maybe I will post the plot as a kind of consolation, and so you guys can also know what I planned to do, and the stuff I was excited for. Nonetheless, in the mean time, this is an indefinite goodbye.

Thank you so so much for sticking with Cassandra, and this entire story. It is discontinued until further notice. But you can know for certain I won't give up :) And if it ever comes I write it again, you will be the first person to know.

I love you guys

- Chantal xx