Relapse / Recovery

Mistakes

These sunny days in LA really were doing something for him. It was almost the start of the third week in this program and he really could feel a difference. The haze that use to crowd around him over these last few years were starting to disappear. The world seemed brighter. Life seemed a little better. All he had to do was get through these last two weeks and that was it. He could see his kids again. He could see all his friends again. Since he was already in LA maybe he could stay an extra day or two and sit in on one of Dre's iconic studio sessions. As much as he didn't mind being out in the sunshine state, he was ready to get home and start life over. Dre definitely wasn't going to let him off easy either. Dre had been strict in sticking to the routine that he had built for him. They did meal prep every week, two workouts every day, he went to sessions every day, and they never had any down time. If there was a gap in the schedule, Dre was going to fill it with something. That's what the program ordered, so it's what the doctor followed. As tiring as it could get, Marshall was thankful for this. Had his friend been an enabler then this off site situation could have gone a lot differently. Had Dre slacked off, or let him slack off, it could have completely gone back on his progress.

He had come really far but he also had a long ways to go. The workouts were starting to kick his ass and he didn't know if it was because he was tired or because Dre was making them more intense. Maybe both? He didn't mind. He had been planning to get healthy and back into shape and if he could get adjusted to this routine and keep up with it then he'd been back to feeling like his old self in no time. He was already seeing a lot of improvement in himself. The only thing that really seemed to stay was the constant tired that he felt throughout the day. He was getting better at being able to sleep on his own but as Dre cut his dossges down he found himself unable to sleep as much as he probably should. His mentor offered naps throughout the day but he didn't want them. If he was going to sleep, he wanted it to be at night so that he could get on a normal schedule.

He got up that sunday morning feeling particularly worn out. Not only was he tired but his body was starting to ache. Working out was supposed to make you sore but now he just hurt. They would give themselves rest days where their workouts were easier but this constant pushing himself was really starting to take it's toll. But of course he could never tell Dre that. He had been doing it so long that it didn't even look like it made him tired. Marshall was doing his best to keep up but it was getting harder and harder and it was kinda starting to piss him off. His body hurt which just made the workouts harder. He got through it though. Their workouts only lasted about two hours a piece which wasn't terrible. He looked forward to knocking those workouts out, getting through his daily sessions, then coming back to the house to write. That same old beat that Dre had given him earlier played on. He had the melody memorized at this point yet he still couldn't come up with any lyrics. At least not anything more than a line or two. As he struggled to write that night he realized that maybe the issue was the beat. It was good but it didn't feel like him. It was a beat that seemed like his old stuff and he didn't want to write like he use to. He wanted to write better. About better things. He shut the beat off and sat the pen and paper to the side. He could ask Dre for a new best tomorrow but for now he needed to try to lie down and hope that the medicine actually kicked in tonight.

As the sun lit up the room Marshall felt like he had barely even had time to rest. He was positive that he had slept he just wasn't sure how hard or for how long. It didn't feel like long at all. His eyes came open just moments before Dre came knocking at his door, it was like he was expecting it. The clock read 7a.m.. He was surprised that his friend had allowed for him to sleep in.

"You got 15 minutes to get ready. It's a little later than usual but I figured you were going to need the extra rest for this."

"For what?"