Spill Me

#4 ShAtTeR tO pIeCes

Flashback...

When I was so taken aback by the decision you took. The moment I wanted to crouch down, laying my back on the cold wall, just hugging my legs and cry, wetting my cheeks. Indeed, that's how I felt but just gave out a calm facial reaction to assure you I'm fine. When I wasn't fine at all, not at all. I could feel myself tearing apart inside, as all those arrows came striking on me in one shot, wanting me to fall apart in pieces and I did. I shattered into pieces that I was afraid of if it's possible to put it all together. All of it was happening when you were standing right in front of me. I don't know whether you can see through it. Me, crying on my friend's shoulder, being embraced. I couldn't hold it anymore at that time. All those days of holding on to those tears in me went worthless in a second of me bursting out. I didn't care if people were looking at me, their eyes on me because all I was concerned was yours wasn't on me, and that hurt more than I thought. You could've shown some signs you're leaving, you could've said you're gonna leave me, leave me in this dark and scary room that's haunting me, slowly swallowing me.

The way you told your decision like you slammed the door on my face. You knew you knew it was so stupid of you to take that decision yet you did it. Even I could say your heart was against it so badly but I couldn't say why you still choose that path. What did I do? What did we do to end this relationship? It's a mess now. When are we gonna clear it?! I'm waiting here...

Those days without you, my laughter was empty, my smile was fake, my ' I'm fine' wasn't true, my mind was a mess, not able to think straight and my heart was still untreated. Falling on my knees, tears staining, wishing you would appear and treat the wound you've created. When... When... As it goes, I realised you would never appear. Would you?

One day singing in the blue together, The other day quietest of all.

Caring for each other now, Pass by strangers later.

Don't really know about me, As much as I do about you.

But label this friendship, As F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

The main reason for me to laugh, Same time cry too.

You're responsible for it, Not me.

Freaking when you're lost, Is not all I could do.

I will run for you, Reach where you are.

But I wanna make sure, You would do the same for me.

A/N: a nightmare.....my fear of sleep.....depressed.....unknown pain....