Most of the story's in here are shit and were probably scrapped.
Alright there are some parts in this story that sound like im talking about relationships or dating but I'm not.
I'm not going to speak about minors in relationships at all because it's just fucked up so yeah
Please don't judge my writing of this book this is just a tone of scrapped fanfics
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I was staring at the wall.
I had just woken up and had me legs hanging off the bed but that's as far as I got.
My arms were extremely sore from the night before,
I love my friends but sometimes the jokes they make do really hurt.
Life can be tiring sometimes.
My parents were always out on some sort of business trip so I was left to do everything myself.
Hey at least they would leave money for bills and groceries!
Wilbur and tubbo did start to notice something was up as face cam streams became less often, I was less active, and they never really heard from my parents.
I was pretty sure there was something going on today but I wasn't really sure.
My thoughts were cut off by a discord call.
It was wilbur.
I quickly got up and turned on my computer, I liked talking to Wilbur but doing anything has just gotten I lot harder.
When I answered Wilbur seemed very exited.
He was a positive person and he was always hard to be sad or angry around but now it's hard to feel like that with anyone.
Sometimes I thing of how much better it would be to just leave everything.
I try to get it off my mind, to leave it all behind.
I don't want to make it worse.
I feel like I can't trust my mind, it's such a lier.
I remember this time deo came over and he caught me hurting myself.
He found me when I thought I was dying.
I couldn't stop crying,
Believe me when I say, I tried so hard to change.
All the crazy shit that goes threw my mind.
Believe me when I say I can never be saved.
I just don't want to try anymore.
I tried to fix myself, make it work.
There was a time I kept Wilbur up all night because how close I was to ending it that day.
I can't carry the weight forever.
Its ending one of two ways,
Someone is going to find out and help,
Or I'll end it all.
I can't fix the hurt.
I want to but it's hard.
I had been ditching school I lot recently but my parents were in a different country so what would they do.
It's not like I'm in high school or anything.
I could just drop out of college and my parents would never know.
Wilbur and I had gotten off the phone awhile ago so I decided to go out.
I grabbed my phone and headphones and left.
I recently found this spot in the woods behind my house,
It was a lovely little spot.
There was this tree near it that was perfect for climbing so I would always go and sit at the top of the tree and listen to music.
It had such an amazing feel to.
Being so high up with nothing but music blasting in your ears was such I free feeling.
I used to do that as a kid to but I would get in my roof, but then we moved and it became to dangerous to do so.
Sometimes it was nice not having my parents around because I could do what I wanted.
I didn't have to make up an excuse for not eating or not wearing short sleeves, it was nice.
