Lᴀsᴛ Wɪsʜᴇs ♥︎𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑢𝑛𝑔♥︎

it's time

Jisungs POV

I came back from the hospital and they said, I don't have much time...
Hardly one month, that's what the gift I was talking about, I made a mistake,.... But not Every mistakes are to be forgiven. It hurts to let go, but it even worse to hold on to it. I can't see him hurt, because of me, I'm going away far away from him.... Life seems without you minho. If I want to stay with you, I can't ... That pain eating me day by day and I'm feeling weak.

My both kidneys are weak, I'm gonna die soon, they said if they found donor they will contact me and they are looking for it, .... I'm not happy to live without Minho, if this is happening with me then there must be a reason, the reason to leave from minhos life, that we both afraid of
A useless life is an early death.. I'm useless, I'm a disappointment

I took medicine but the pain was still there, I want to make my wish come true,...

I want to see a magic sea, but that could be seen on a very specific occasions,  that means I can't, ....

Today I will make my other wishes
To become reality if I'm able to, from all my six wishes I had completed most of it with Minho, unintentionally. We went for a long drive and had sex at the beach... We had a couple t-shirt date and went to an amusement park just coz I want to ride on that thing where people's almost flipped backward the dancing ball, I don't know what it is called but that's fun and even funny to see people jumping and falling.

We watched the sunset and made food... I checked my list and the thing I want to do is that ... With my best friend

I thought for an hour then called him finally, after fighting with myself to call or even meet him how shameless I am? Right, hoping he to meet me

He received,
"Hello!" He was sleeping I think, his voice was deep than usual

I was fighting with myself to talk to him to say a word but I think I couldn't, I hurt all of them, how could I even face them? I was Going to end the call when he spoke again

"Say something, I know it's you"

He knows? I sighed and breath

"C-can we meet?" I asked knowing he will reject me, after about some moment, I heard him sigh "okay text me where" and he ended the call

I felt a relief, at least my best friend will forgive me, at I'm going with one hug... To recall

I texted him the cafes address and we're gonna meet at 4 pm, I got ready and left to meet him, I was never that nervous to meet anyone, not even with Minho when he first asked me out, I'm nervous as hell, he is the most important person of my life, not important than minhos but still.

I entered the cafe and saw a blonde, freckled boy sitting on a table at the last, he looked at me but didn't smile. What I expected, he will smile at me and hug me so tight that I can't breathe?

I sat on a chair in front of him and couldn't dare to look at him, he can be intimidating you can't judge him looking at his cute face, and cuddly behavior, he can be a Satan.

After an awkward silence, awkward but I felt relief because I'm with my best friend after a long time, he fake coughed and  I looked at him

"Why do you wanna meet?" He asked

I was shivering, and fiddling with my fingers under the table "i-i want to apologize, see I was"

"I'm not here to hear your story, you did at the day you came back with marks all on your neck"

He can be sarcastic, this hurts like hell
"I know, but can you forgive me? At least I want to go with peace" I said

He furrowed his brows, "where are you going? Are you finally leaving him? Going back with that bastard?"

"N-no, trust me I hurted him enough, I don't want to hurt him more by leaving him for that man, I'm just going far away?"

He still didn't get my words but I can tell him, right?

"C-can we drink?" I asked and he said yes....

It's past ten and we are drinking just like our first time, we are sitting on a building's wall, looking at the cars and lights of the city

It felt like dream, cold air passing by giving us chills, we both enjoying this moment.

"Do you feel guilty?" He asked

I just hummed, I can't say it in words how guilty I'm

"How can you hurt that man who loves you endlessly ji?"

By this tears started falling from my eyes, finally, I'm sharing something that's bothering me.

"I d-dint"

"You can cry while hugging me? I know you are suffering too" he said I looked at him, I didn't waste my time, I just hugged him and cried, cried like there's no tomorrow

"I d-didn't want to h-hurt him, I loved him so much. That day, I went to the bar but then I met h-him he forced me to drink m-more and brought me to his h-house and I don't know what came to my mind, I left with him, he forced me to do things but, I never let him do that, he k-kissed me, bite me but we didn't do it, he was drunk and I was too, he slept after that and I did the same, but I don't know when he took those photos, I would never think of cheating on him lix, I would never" I sobbed and choked on it, Felix drawing circles on my back to calm me, he didn't say anything he just let me let it all out "I'm a bad boyfriend, I'm a bad person, why I even went to the bar alone? Why? it's all my fault"

He pulled away and looks at me shaking my shoulders
"Why didn't you tell me you stupid!! You could've told us you didn't do anything and he was the one who forced you! ... Jisung!! Are you crazy you both are suffering, without anything!!" He yelled at me but who's gonna tell him, if I wouldn't have told them they will gonna suffer more

"s-seeing him suffer even more it makes me feel I should die lix, I'm g-going to die"

"W-what do you m-mean?" He asked

"It's was after marriage when it pained in my stomach and without telling Minho, I went for a check-up and after a week I got a report... That says .. m-my both kidneys are weak, i-i don't have much t-time, I was crying on the way when I just want to drink and then I went to a bar"

Felix looked at me, I saw tears falling from his eyes too, he pulled that bottle from my head and hugged me tighter "you shouldn't have drunk!! You stupid!! Why didn't you told us, we could have found something... there's a way right? We can find a donor right?"

He asked me, I nodded, he pulled away and hold my face "I c-can't live without my best friend" "we will find someone, okay?"

I smiled

"Can you promise me to make my wish come true? "

He laughed "its your wish right? While sitting on a wall and drinking with a best friend?"

I smiled and hugged him once more

"I will make your every wish to become true" he said

"I have thousand reasons to die, and many millions reasons to cry"