Outsider

we'll all be fine-20

Nothing can be simple. Whatever the hell I did in my past life is sure coming back to bite me now, I think, as I stare at Spencer a few feet away from me. Elle's hand is tight around my arm as I look at him.

There's silence, eyes on us as I stare at the boy in front of me. He's nothing more than a boy, impulsive and immature, propelled this far only by his intelligence. He's still young, and sympathy starts to creep in. Until he opens his mouth.

"I heard you're leaving." He says, sounding disturbingly confident for a guy I could easily have on the ground in seconds.

"Yeah." I say, seeing Hotch come out of his office in my peripheral.

"It's probably for the best." Spencer says and Elle's grip gets impossibly tight.

"Don't." I mumble at her, hoping for an easy exit.

"Don't tell her what to do." Spencer says.

"Have you lost your mind?" I glare at him. "You need to back off."

"I don't have to do shit." My mind is reeling at the person I see in front of me. This is not the Spencer I knew, that dropped random facts and let himself be pushed around. Part of me wants to feel some sort of pride at his confidence, but the other half of me despises the way he draws himself up straight and stares down on me, a glare across his face.

Elle takes a step forward, seething, and I go to grab her hand, but someone grabs my elbow.

"You three." Gideon's voice says from behind me. He reaches out and grabs Spencer's arm, tugging us. I protest as he yanks us into the round table room, Elle trailing behind.

"You all are adults. Figure it the hell out."

"Gideon, you can't-"

"I damn well can." He says gruffly, shutting the door. Bitter silence descends over us, Spencer's eyes laser focused on Elle.

"You know, I've been here a lot longer than you have, Sawyer." He starts. "I've known Elle longer. I-" I begin to cut him off but Elle beats me to it.

"You've known me longer, but you sure as hell don't know me better. And this is completely insane- you, this whole thing. I mean, what is your goal here, Spencer? To tear this team apart? Because that's the direction we're heading in!"

"I'm not tearing the team apart." He argues, a whine edging into his voice.

"You got Sawyer reassigned."

"She's not part of the team." He says and Elle looks absolutely furious.

"You're right. I'm not. You've done a damn fine job of destroying any chance of that." I say, stepping to Elle's side. "But you know what? I don't need to be a part of this team to be happy. I have things that make me happy." I glance at Elle, whose eyes are trained on me. I take a breath and continue.

"I don't know if you have things that make you happy, but if you don't, this isn't the way to go about finding them. You don't try to ruin careers. You don't hurt people."

"Like you hurt me?"

"I apologized for that." Elle spits. "There wasn't anything we could do."

"A little honesty would have been nice." The confidence Spencer had earlier was ebbing away, replaced by a dejected version of his regular self.

"I'm sorry, Spencer." I say. "But you hurt us right back. And that sucked. That really sucked. Gideon's right, we're adults and should act like it. I wanted to be friends with you, Spencer, but it all got screwed up, and for that I apologize. But this shit needs to end. No more coming after me, my job, and no more coming after Elle." I know Elle can defend herself just fine, and is more than capable of standing up for herself, but I feel fiercely protective of the woman I love.

Spencer doesn't answer, he just stares at me. After a minute, I can't take it.

"I'm going to pack my stuff. Call me if you want to fix this." I tell Spencer, offering an olive branch despite the dread that the idea of interacting with him more fills me with. Elle follows me out of the conference room. It's silent in our part of the bullpen, Morgan sitting on the edge of my desk holding a cardboard box.

"I thought Hotch was joking when he said you were leaving." He says quietly, and I feel like my heart is in a vice. Morgan had become my best friend in the time I was at the BAU, and knowing I wouldn't see him everyday sucked. What sucked more, though, was not knowing whether he was on Spencer's side. I wouldn't begrudge him for it, he'd known Spencer far longer, but I desperately hoped he could be neutral. The team didn't need anymore divisions.

"Yeah." I say, taking the box from him. "I'm staying in this building though. Floor 3."

"That's good." Morgan says, meeting my eyes.

"God." I whisper. "I'm so sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I shouldn't-I don't know." I push my hair back, frowning.

"We're still friends, Vandy. Can't get rid of me." The smile he cracks fills me with relief and I drop the box, wrapping my arms around his neck. He hugs me tightly, and some of my stress melts away.

"Good to hear." I step back and sigh. "I'll miss you, though."

"Princess, you ain't shaking me. Don't come here with that 'miss you' business." I laugh and look at Elle, who is staring at the conference room, where Spencer sits, staring at his hands.

"Spencer will be fine." Morgan says, and she nods. "We'll all be fine."

"I hope so." Elle says. "God, I really hope so."

ugh. i. hate. this. i kid you not, this was the eighth draft bc i hated it each time. not sure how i feel about it now, i don't think i'm very good at writing confrontations. let me know what you think (be honestttt)

also pop quiz what do you guys think my native language is? i wanna see if any of u will guess it right :) -sasha <3