❝why enter a relationship that you know will eventually end?
but what if it doesn't, what's if it lasts forever?❞
Charlotte moved to NYC once she was accepted into her dream school, Tisch, and her dream of becoming a dancer is getting closer with...
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"You're so gonna get that solo" Had I taken it too far by telling her that? I thought about her green eyes and her laugh all the way home.
I had never experienced this feeling, deep in my stomach I know she's going to affect my life more than I want to admit, I was usually confident around girls, I never thought twice before saying something or double-checked myself in the mirror before meeting up with anyone, yesterday while I was waiting for her to shower and get changed I entered the dance room she was in and checked my hair and my face, and don't even get me started on before and after that, seeing her dance to the melody so carefree and unbothered, I couldn't get the song out of my head, I couldn't get her out of my head.
And this is new, and scary, I don't want to be a dick distance myself from her because I enjoy her company, but I am scared of what will happen if I don't, if instead I get closer to her.
"Kalen" I hear someone scream my name and turn around just to see Genevieve walking to me through campus, "why the screaming?" I ask as she finally approached me "Maybe because I've been calling your name for three minutes but you've been ignoring me" She rolls her eyes "Sorry I was just thinking" I say hoping she'll drop the subject, but knowing she's exactly like Daiz, I know she won't.
"Did your thoughts revolve around a certain green eyed brunette girl?" She says eyeing me suspiciously to what I groan and she chuckles.
"I just can't seem to escape her" I tell sigh "her or your feelings?" She backfires the question, after thinking about it for a moment I say "both" "and what's so wrong about that?" she asks getting into her role of mom of the group.
"It's not wrong, it's just new" I say but she knows there's something more "new and?" I know she won't leave me alone until I say it so I give in "Scary" I say and drop my head embarrassed of having admitted it.
"Kalen, you can't be living like this anymore, I know it's hard for you and everything related to opening up it's scary, but you can't let a bad experience affect you like this, I'm not saying it because Lottie is my friend or because I think she's good for you, but just know that not everyone wants to hurt you" She says which reminds me a lot of what Ethan said to me the other day.
What is it with my friends giving me speeches about my feelings lately?
"You're sure you don't want to change your major to physiology? there's still time to do it" I say trying to light up the conversation, "I'm serious Kal" She says but laughs nonetheless, and I realize it's true, Charlotte is a great girl, and I'm not saying I will go and tell her everything about me, but I can't keep letting her break down the walls I have built around myself, I like spending time with her as a friend and yeah maybe there is some sexual tension around us, she is sweet but also has a very bold side, and I cannot have a relationship right now, I have to get drafted, and let's face it I am not emotionally available, not that I like her in that way, at least not right now. I just need to be my normal confident self, easy right?
